God's Gonna Cut You Down
by marinaandthedorks
Summary: [He only had one fucking purpose in his life: survive, so he could protect his brother. But surviving ain't easy,—neither is dying.] Merle amputates his hand in order to escape, but his situation goes from bad to worse due to his bloodloss. However, he suddenly he gets help from an unknown person. But the one question that truly matters is, friend or enemy? [evt. OC x Merle]
1. Chapter 1

_**[A/N] Thank you so much for checking out my story! The story starts at the point when Merle is handcuffed on the roof in Atlanta and from then it will pretty much follow the storyline of the show. The first chapters are only Merle's POV, but soon it'll switch POV's between Merle and Emmaly (oc).**_

_**Also, English isn't my native language, so bear with me here. Reviews/feedback are very much appreciated. **_

_**I hope you'll like the story!**_

* * *

**_Rated M for language (cursing) and violence._**

_I do not own the Walking Dead. I only own my OC and the storyline I created._

* * *

Merle Dixon wasn't exactly the definition of a hero.

No. He was far from that. But he wasn't a coward either. Even though he did some pretty fucked up things in his life.  
And now he was being_ punished_ for it.

The Atlantic sun was blurring his view, while his tongue seemed to dry up. He was getting dehydrated. His skin was probably burned already, but Merle felt numb anyway.  
Not sure how to be, what to say, what to do, Merle looked up in the sky and closed his eyes for a moment. _Fuckers_, he grumbled to himself. But he only burst out in laughter.

A noise. Was it from the sky? Was _He_ trying to send him a message? For all he knew, he could be dead already, because this surely felt like an appetizer to hell. The realisation hit him and he felt the handcuff around his wrist again. "No, no no," he said, begging, feeling trapped like an animal.  
Merle tried to turn around, to see where the noise came from, with the little energy he had left.

_Hands._

Hands from the dead, trying to get through the door. Shortly after, he saw their ugly ass faces. Fortunately the door was chained, however the idea of them actually breaking through and getting him, while he was helplessly handcuffed to a pipe, made him panic. He kept yanking his hand back, causing more blood to spill.

"I know I need t' be punished," he pleaded, hoping the Lord would hear him. "I deserve this, I deserve this.. Help me now, show me the way, I don't know what to do.. _Help_ me. Please,_ please, please_."

But why would he pray or plead.. Did that motherfucker ever help him when his Ol' man beat him up? Or when his momma set herself on fire, even though she promised to be there for him?

_No, that selfish ass didn' care 'bout me then, so sure as hell he won't care 'bout me now._

Anger was flowing through his veins.

His body fell down and he rolled under the pipe when he suddenly realised the nigger dropped the tools earlier.

The belt was lying there and he managed to get it with his free hand, so he could try to get the hacksaw by using the belt. _It was his only hope._

"I ain't begged you before.. I ain't gonn' start beggin' now. _I ain't gonn' start beggin' you now_. Don't'cha worry 'bout me."

His eyes were still blurry, but he could see clear enough to use the belt. Soon he realized what he was about to do in order to get away. "_Fuck_!" he yelled, causing the walkers behind him to groan louder while they tried to reach for him.  
Merle knew he had to use his belt in order to reduce the bleeding and he dearly hoped it would actually work.  
He threw the belt towards the hacksaw and tried to scrape it towards him. 20 minutes passed, before it finally seemed to work. The hacksaw was in front of his feet now, so he could grab it with his free hand. "Th' nigga makin' me cut m' own arm off," he groaned to no one in particular, while grabbing his belt and attaching it on his wrist. He tightened it until he was sure it would stay. His other hand trembled as it took the hacksaw, but when he heard the walkers making even more noise, he bit his tongue and did what he had to do.

* * *

He saw his own blood. He wasn't scared of his blood, but to see his own hand in front of him was…_horrifying_. Even for _Merle_.  
He took off his shirt without thinking and pushed it to the wound, causing him to bite his tongue until he tasted his own blood. _Ya fuckin' pussy_, he said to himself, _ya ain't gon' cry like a bitch now_. He moved, but he felt dizzy because of his blood loss. While forcing himself to walk, he tried to regain his balance. There was another door. Almost feeling relieved, Merle staggered towards it and opened it._ I ain't dead yet_, he said to himself.

* * *

He couldn't see shit; it was too dark. If he didn't do something about his wound, he would probably bleed to death. "That'd be a shit way t' go," he said with his rasping voice, causing him to burst out in laughter because of the pain.

Merle tried to stay steady, but he fell. And somewhere, he feared he couldn't get up anymore.

He thought about Daryl.

What if Daryl would find him like this? Or worse, _what if he wouldn't find him at all?_  
How would he feel, if it were Daryl handcuffed to a roof?

**_Toughen' up. Ya soundin' like a damn woman._**

He wasn't sure if he heard Daryl in his thoughts, or if he was going insane. Was this what dying felt like? Spending your last minutes in bitterness, while going insane?

He heard footsteps behind him, but he didn't bother to turn around and defend himself. "Ya got me—ya better 'njoy m' body, it went thru' a lot."  
"Sorry, I dorn't_ fuck_ oan a first date."  
The voice startled him and he looked up to the person's face, that was now hanging above him. His view was blurry and so he couldn't see the person.  
"_Too bad_, I'd give ya a good time."  
His lips curled into a smile, not knowing whether this was all happening inside his head or if it was real. If it was another dream, Merle wouldn't mind.  
And while thinking about it, he lost consciousness.


	2. Chapter 2

**__****I do not own the Walking Dead. I only own my OC and the storyline I created.**  


* * *

He heard some noises in the distance, but his eyes were still closed. Footsteps, swearing in some strange accent Merle couldn't recognize, and the sound of something metal tapping to something else.  
The footsteps came closer to him.  
"'M sorry, but I need tae dae this."  
Before he could reply, or open his eyes even, he smelled his own skin getting burned. The pain came right after that, probably even worse than when he cut his own hand off. He screamed, but a sudden hand covered his mouth and muffled the screams.  
He passed out again.

* * *

Dreams (that he couldn't remember) brought him back to his senses. In his dream, he was feeling burnt out, with a terrible pain.  
He woke up and noticed a stranger standing before him.  
_It was a woman_. Out of all people, he had to be saved by a _woman_. But he couldn't complain about the view, though. She was probably in her late 20's, with dark brown, wavy hair. Her body was skinny, yet muscled. She was tall and her legs were fucking _perfect_. Merle noticed the leg knife strap around her thigh.  
"Goodmornin' sunshine," she chuckled. Merle realized right away that he heard the voice before. He wasn't dreaming and he didn't die.  
_Or he was dead and this was heaven._  
He roamed his eyes over her body and blinked. Merle whistled, even though his mouth was dry as fuck. _Fuckin' hell.. I'd tap that_.. He couldn't help himself and stared at her ass. It must've been ages since his last one night stand. Or atleast, it _seemed_ like ages to him.  
"G'mornin' to you too, darlin'." Merle winked at her, causing the woman to roll her eyes.  
The woman turned around, with her back towards him, and Merle's instinct alarmed him right away. Even though he was still staring at her ass, he stood up anyhow. He realized he didn't have his strength back yet, but put his good arm around her neck tightly. The woman was rather surprised than afraid, because he heard her laugh.  
"Ya think 'm playin' a game darlin', I could break ya neck, right here right now." ,He whispered in her ear, pushing his body against hers. He felt her ass against his sensitive spot and he imagined all the things he could do with this little piece of heaven.. But he quickly banished the fantasies out of his mind. The woman chuckled again at his threat.  
"What 'r ye gonna dae, punch me wi' yer stump?"  
Merle blinked a few times, utterly surprised of her reaction. He already knew she wouldn't get intimidated by him or his presence any time soon, since the woman practically saved his life.  
_Saved his life_.  
**_I owe her, goddamnit._**  
"Mind aswell tell me a bit 'bout y'self," he rasped, moving closer to her, still holding her in his grip. "Friend or enemy?"  
"Friend. Why else wood I pit all thew effort in a one handed man, if I coold've just left ye tae die here?"  
Merle sighed.  
"Nao, can ye give m' some space an' back off a little? Yoo're in m' personal bubble."  
He released his grasp and took a step back, still not letting his eyes leave her. "Personal bubble?" He repeated in confusion.  
She rolled her eyes. "M' fucking aura."  
What was up with this girl?_ Why the fuck would she save him? _What did_ she_ want from _him_?  
"Ya don' sound very American' t' me," he stated.  
The girl only shrugged. "Aam Scottish," she explained.  
Merle's eyes widened. "Darlin', ya far away from home."  
The girl rolled her eyes again and sighed.  
"Ye better sit doon," she commanded him.  
_Who th' fuck does she think she is, t' fuckin' command me like tha'?_  
He cleared his throat before replying. "M' sorry, _what'dya say_?"  
"Sit. Doon." She recalled while grabbing her backpack. Merle took a step forward, trying to tower over her.  
"Och please, dorn't embarrass yerself. We dorn't hae time tae discuss woman rights. We need tae get movin'."  
The girl turned around, holding a water bottle and some dried turkey. "Hoo aboot we play a little game. I will give ye this an' ye tell me yer name. Simple as 'at."  
A satisfying smile crept on her face, causing Merle to grind his teeth. His stomach felt empty and he couldn't possibly make it 4 miles if he didn't get any food or water. Plus his conditions weren't very much in his favor.  
"Merle," he said. "How 'bout ya give me yours 's well?"  
The girl grinned. Merle was about to out explode with rage, not amused with her attitude.  
"Emmaly," she said. "—But I'd rather hae ye tae call me Ems."  
Merle relaxed again and sat down on the chair that was standing in the room. He then noticed that all the doors were barricaded with old wood and the windows were covered with old cloths. The girl,Emmaly, kneeled down before him and crossed her legs. She handed over the bottle with water and the dried turkey. Merle took it from her and finished half of the water bottle, knowing he'd better save it for later, when he really needed it. He took a bite from the turkey and slowly started chewing it.  
"I'm sorry, I dorn't hae much food left. 'At was all I coods spare." She nodded at the turkey. Merle bored her eyes into his and decided to get to the point already.  
"Why did'ya save me? Wa' am I worth t' ya?"  
The girl shrugged. Merle raised his eyebrows at her. "Honestly, I thooght this wood be a safe spot, until there were walkers err'ywhere. I managed tae shake them off an' barricaded th' door. That's when I foond ye."  
Merle still didn't believe her story. Emmaly rolled her eyes.  
"Basically I saved yer ass, coz unlike others, I still hae some humanity left in me.", she added, while looking at him.  
There was something about her explanation that made Merle calm down, for now at least. "N' what'dya expect from me now?"  
"Honestly? Nae much. We cood travel together an' find out if there's more life in this world left."  
This girl would only slow me down, a voice in his mind concluded.  
"Yoo're nae th' only one that knows hoo tae survive.", she answered his thoughts, looking at him with an accusing look on her face. Merle only sighed.  
"M' looking for m,-" he immediately shut up. Emmaly leaned forward. "_Yes_?  
He quickly tried to find some words to say. "I don' know. Just try'na stay alive, I guess."  
Emmaly nodded and changed the topic. "How 'r ye feelin'?"  
Merle shrugged, while looking at his arm and the wound that was now dark red. _"Never better."_  
Emmaly tried to keep herself from laughing. "Ya think that's funny girl? How 'm I s'pposed t' defend m'self with only one hand?"  
"Ye dorn't. Just hide behin' me an' I'll protect ye. Dorn't worry _princess_, naethin' will happen tae ye."  
With those words spoken, she stood up and prepared her backpack. Merle didn't like the way she was mocking with him, but he decided to let the frustration slide.  
_Ain't got no use to be fightin' her already_, he murmured to himself as he stood up.

**_Doesn't mean I won't._**


	3. Chapter 3

"So, what 'd we do now, _sugar?_"  
Emmaly turned around and walked towards Merle.  
"_You_—," she gave him duct tape and frowned, "—just come wi' me an' stay close, until we're ootta this damned city."  
Merle sighed to himself and grabbed the duct tape out of her hands. He tried to balance the long knife on the piece of metal, that he used for his 'hand'. It wasn't much —_hel_l, it was just something improvised, but at least he had something to defend himself with if he needed to. _No way 'm gon' let 'at girl fight for me,_ he rasped to himself in thought. _We'd be dead within minutes._  
The knife kept falling on the ground and along with that Merle was losing his patience. Emmaly turned around when she heard the metal clatter on the ground. "Y'know, ye can just ask me tae help ye wi' 'at,—'M nae gonna bite ye or anythin'."  
Merle looked at her and rolled his eyes. "That's funny', comin' from someone who could've bin' bitten, 'cuz she's too stupid t' avoid a place thats filled wi' walkers," he spat out, grabbing the knife and laying it on the metal again. Emmaly didn't say anything —for_ fucks_ sake, he finally made her shut up.

* * *

There was a long silence. Merle attempted to duct tape the knife onto his 'hand' and Emmaly continued to pack the things she had left.  
"Ye know, some gratitude wood be nice."  
Her voice broke through Merle's thoughts. "I'd rather 've died on that fucking roof, 'nstead of bein' saved by a woman." he growled back at her.  
Emmaly rolled her eyes at him and hoisted the backpack on her back. She checked to make sure all her knives were in the right place and walked towards Merle.  
"Or ye can jist swallow yer pride an' accept yer _fate_. Ye dorn't know me, 'n 'ats fine, ye dorn't have tae if ye dorn't want tae." Her face moved towards his, until they were inches apart from each other. Merle didn't care; her intimidating attitude wouldn't do _shit_ to him.  
"But know this,—_I saved yer fuckin' life_. Now, I dunnae if ye have folks out there, but it's selfish tae say yoo'd rather be dead than saved by a _woman_."  
Merle could feel her breath and as soon as he knew what 'folks'* meant, he looked away for a few seconds, only to look back at her a few seconds later with a disgusted look on his face. Emmaly only seemed to become angrier.  
"What th' fuck 's wrong wi' ye?! I ain't much different than ye, _asshole_. So ye can come wi' me, die, or attempt tae go out there on yer own —but let m' tell ye this, th' fuckin' place is filled wi' walkers. An' in yer condition, it's almost impossible tae make it 3 miles without any food or water."  
Merle would've hit her by now, if she hadn't be right, because she _was_. His conditions were indeed bad; his wound was far from healed and he didn't have any food or water._ But she crossed th' fuckin' line_, he grumbled to himself in thought.  
Emmaly grabbed the knife and the duct tape. They made eye contact before she taped the knife to the metal. It only took a few minutes, causing Merle to swear to himself in thought.  
Without saying anything, she stood up. "Ye ready?" she questioned, waiting for him to follow her. He didn't say anything in response, but only stood up and waited to her to take the lead.  
They left the room, as quietly as possible, while Emmaly used her flashlight to make sure every room was clear. They eventually had to kill 3 walkers.  
"'N what'dya 'd planned next, _Scotty?_" He looked at the alley, which was empty so far. Emmaly only focused on the alley and ignored the nickname he came up with.  
"I had a car," she stated. "But I dunnae if 'ts still 'ere."  
Merle followed her look, but couldn't find it.  
"Where 's it?" He asked, looking at her. Emmaly sighed and held the knife ready.  
"Parkin' lot, a block from 'ere." She pointed at the direction and looked at Merle. He grumbled to himself, until Emmaly looked at him with a confused look on her face.  
"Ya gotta be kiddin', _right_?", he said, speaking his thoughts out.  
"_No_." She simply replied. "Now let's go."  
They slowly moved forward, until they were sure there weren't any walkers on the street. They almost turned right until Merle noticed the herd, probably 47 walkers. He immediately stopped and pushed Emmaly back, finding out he almost did it to protect her.  
"_Fuck,_" she whispered, until Merle laid his finger on his lips, implying her to shut up. Emmaly's eyes widened when she realized why they stopped. They both turned around and tried to run back as quietly as possible.  
But Emmaly stopped Merle by grabbing his shoulders.

There were 12 walkers in front of them, groaning when they noticed their fresh meal.

* * *

***Folks** - Scottish word for family


	4. Chapter 4

**___I do not own the Walking Dead. I only own my OC and the storyline I created._**

* * *

_**Merle**_  
They exchanged looks while they prepared themselves for the worst. Merle breathed heavily.  
_Time t' try out this stupid thing_, he thought while looking at the knife that was attached to the metal on his wrist. He sighed, realizing this would be the only opportunity to do what he wanted to.  
_Ain't got much 'f a choice_, he said to himself, almost seeming like he was making up an excuse, only so he wouldn't feel guilty afterwards._ She'd only slow me down._  
His glance lingered on Emmaly, who was already struggling to keep 2 walkers off of her. Merle inhaled, tried to forget she was there and ran away, while stabbing any walker on the move that tried to block him.

* * *

_**Emmaly**_  
Emmaly was trying to stab them as fast as she could, while staying focused and concentrated. She managed to stab the walkers right between the eyes, so they would fall down right away to block the others, providing her more time. Emmaly was sweating like crazy and she didn't know how long she was able to put up with this shit.  
Finally, after about 25 minutes, all the walkers were out of the alley. Soon she realized the other walkers from the street had heard her; they were staggering towards her in a quick pace. Emmaly turned around and noticed that Merle was missing.  
"Son 'f a _fuckin'_ bitch," she groaned angrily while kicking a dead body in front of her.  
_I shood 've known better_, she said to herself while feeling more furious than ever. Meanwhile, the walkers were still coming and all Emmaly could do was pray. She only had a few knives to defend herself with, but even a _gun_ couldn't save her ass now.

* * *

_**Merle**_

Merle was searching for a way out; a car—or a fucking_ bike_ even, _anything_ to get him out of this_ shit_ hole.  
He continued to jog so he could save up his stamina, but somewhere in the back of his mind he felt bad.  
_What the fuck?_  
While attempting to clear his mind he soon realized why he was feeling this way.  
"Th' goddamn bitch shoudn've saved me," he muttered while slowing down. Maybe he was wrong about her—_or maybe not_. For all he knew she'd be dead right now, even if he went back, he would only risk his life again.  
_But what 'at worth t' ya when ya do something like this?_ Could he live with that, knowing he indirectly killed someone good by letting her undergo her fate like this? Sure, Merle's hand weren't clean; he had killed a few men during the apocalypse. But somehow this felt _different_. She risked her_ life_ by saving him.  
Merle turned around and ran back towards the alley, as fast as he could. It only took a few minutes—_even though it felt like ages_— when he reached the spot again where the outburst had started.  
He was utterly shocked and surprised when he saw what was happening in front of him.  
Emmaly was still alive.  
Her face was red from walker's blood, while she kept stabbing the numerous amount of walkers. Even though she would lose anyhow, she stayed focused, never missing the head of the walker that threatened to bite her. Emmaly managed to walk backwards through the alley every now and then, to avoid they would come at her all at once. Merle smirked and coughed loudly, amused but also thunderstruck because he was wrong about her. He'd underestimated her and deep down inside, Emmaly had earned some of Merle's respect. His eyes automatically glanced over her moving ass again. Fuck, _that_ deserved a hell of a lot respect.  
She noticed him. Only one glance was enough to make her lurch in his direction.  
"Care tae help m' little? 'M kind 'f havin' a situation 'ere," she yelled at him.  
Merle noticed the fury in her eyes and he was even more amused as he started to stab some walkers, until they killed enough of them to get away safely.  
"Ya wann' stick 'r'ound for tea 'r what? Run!" He yelled while he pushed her forward, encouraging her to take the lead.

* * *

_**Emmaly**_  
Emmaly ran away as fast as she could, not even caring whether Merle was able to keep up with her or not.  
_Th' fucker bett'r prepare 'mself_, she mumbled to herself while she kept running.  
They must've run for at least 2 hours until they reached the parking lot. Emmaly sighed in relief when she saw the grey familiar pick-up.  
"That it?" She heard Merle say with an outraged tone. Emmaly opened the truck and found the keys that she'd kept hidden in her bra, in case Merle would run off and steal the keys. She sat down and started the car. Merle sat down next to her in the passenger seat. When they closed the door, Emmaly hit the gas pedal and drove away.  
"What did ye expect, _a fuckin' limousine_?" she snapped at him in response at the comment he made earlier. Merle only shrugged and looked out of the window. The rest of their journey proceeded in silence.

* * *

_**Merle**_  
A loud noise and the sound of a slapping door brought him back to reality and he soon realized he had fallen asleep.  
"Fuck," he said, rubbing his eyes with his good hand. When he turned around he found out that Emmaly was nowhere in sight.  
The sudden smash startled him, but when the door opened, it was just Emmaly. She didn't say anything but started the car again and continued to drive.  
Merle still didn't say anything, not knowing what to say after what happened today. He didn't know whether to feel guilty or not; Emmaly saved his life and yet he didn't want to give in to that feeling.  
_I ain't sorry for nothin'. I was never sorry for anythin' and just 'cause one chick decided t' come into m' life won't change anythin' at all._  
He peeked at her from the corner of his eye and noticed she was beginning to feel sleepy, as she blinked a few times and tried to hold back a yawn.  
"Why don't' 'cha let me drive for a while, huh?" He offered, turning his head to look at her.  
Emmaly didn't even grant one single look with him. "Ye gotta be fuckin' kiddin',_ rite_?" she scoffed, while her eyes remained on the road.  
Merle only shrugged. "Just tryin' t' be polite," he mumbled, more to himself than actually answering her comment.

* * *

_**Emmaly**_  
Her eyes started to feel heavier than ever and she realized she really needed sleep, or else they'd end up having an accident. They were probably far away from Atlanta city, so Emmaly looked around, trying to find a good spot to stop the car. But before she could do anything, the engine started to sputter.  
_They ran out of fucking gas._  
Emmaly had been _so_ focused—to get away from that fucking city as far as possible,—that she totally forgot to keep an eye on the gas meter.  
Her reaction ability had slowed down from the lack of sleep and before she could do nor say anything, the car bumped into a tree.

It wasn't really a terrible accident, but it was hard enough for Emmaly to hit her head on the steering wheel and lose consciousness.


	5. Chapter 5

_**Merle**_  
Merle woke up, swearing and cursing and realizing he had fallen asleep again.

He noticed they stopped—and _how_ they stopped, as he peeked through the window and saw a tree. He turned around and saw Emmaly with her eyes closed, laying unconsciously on the steering wheel. There was a little bit of blood on her head, but it didn't look life threatening to Merle.  
"An' 'ats exactly th' reason why women shouldn' be allowed t' drive," he rasped when he opened the door and walked over to the trunk.  
"_What the._."  
Inside the trunk he found a box, that was filled with some canned food, a pack of cigarettes, 3 bottles of water and even a small bottle of Vodka. Cursing at himself but also at Emmaly for being so reckless, he grabbed her backpack and stuffed all the supplies in it. Merle hoisted the backpack on his back, while looking around to see if there were any walkers. When he was sure the coast was clear, he made his way to the driver's seat and opened the door. Emmaly was still unconscious, so he lifted her in his arms, realizing that she wasn't heavy at all. But Merle wasn't surprised by this; she must've lost a lot of weight from the lack of food.  
Carefully not to stab her with his metal hand, he walked towards the forest and tried to move faster; the deeper they would be into the forest, the better. He wanted to avoid unfriendly guests, walker or not.

Merle pushed himself to his limits; he was probably walking for 2 hours and it must've been midnight already since the sky was full of stars above them. He felt Emmaly moving under his arm, but he didn't really pay attention to it—he wanted to keep moving. Maybe they'd find shelter somewhere.  
But he stopped when he felt the cold steel against his throat.  
Looking down, Emmaly had her eyes slightly opened. But she was far too weak: even _if_ she wanted to try to _actually_ kill him, she likely couldn't.  
"Where 'r we? Why 'r ye carryin' me?"  
Merle sighed. "Ya decided t' bump th' car into a tree," he whispered while he started to walk again. But before Merle could ask her anything, he noticed her eyes were closed again and the knife was now resting on her stomach.  
Merle stopped and crouched so Emmaly wouldn't fall, only so he could grab the knife and put it behind his belt. He wanted to prevent situations like these from now on.  
"_Ya ain't gon' kill me_," he whispered to the unconscious girl while he lifted her up again.

* * *

_**Emmaly**_  
A splitting headache brought her back to her senses. She sat up straight and looked around her, trying to get an indication about where she was and who had brought her here. When she looked up, she only saw a crackling fire and noticed she was laying on a large jacket. One that wasn't hers. She tried to focus, to remember anything that happened last night, but her mind felt like jelly.  
But before she could do or say anything, she was pushed onto the ground. Her head was lying in someone's lap,—_his_ lap. She looked up at him. Merle didn't reveal any emotion as he pushed his metal hand with the knife on her throat.  
"Ya try anythin', I swear t' God, _I'll cut ya throat_, got it?"  
Emmaly nodded. Merle let go and pushed her up again so she could sit down. He walked over towards her backpack that was put against a tree. Emmaly inhaled and stood up as quietly as possible. Step by step she crept towards Merle, until she stood right behind him. She tapped him on the shoulder and he turned around.  
Emmaly raised her fist and hit him with full force on the nose.


	6. Chapter 6

_**Merle**_  
While flinching back from the sharp pain, his hand moved to his nose and touched it carefully. His hand was now full of blood. Even though the pain wasn't that bad, he was still startled because of this action. It was fair to say that he hadn't seen this coming at _all_.  
He only looked at Emmaly, while his eyes grew wide with anger. _Th' bitch just hit me_. He tried to control his anger by holding his nose and pinching it to stop the bleeding.  
"Th' fuck?!" he screamed, but Emmaly tried to remain strong in front of him. "Ya better got a fuckin' explanation for doin' this t' me!"  
Emmaly only blinked and her eyes were now filled with rage as well.  
"I was expectin' a fuckin' apology 'fter 'at cute lil' _thing_ ye did back in Atlanta," she hissed, not even trying to break eye contact with him as she pierced her blue eyes into his.  
Merle paced towards her, not even bothered the fact that he was in her "_personal bubble_"; he was now only a few inches away from her.  
"I ain't apologizing for nothin',_ sugar_." He whispered, still holding on to the gaze. Emmaly blinked and came even closer to him.  
"That's okay, I dorn't need one 'nymore. I already _solved_ it m'self," she replied, nodding and referring to his bloodied nose.  
"I saved ya ass too," Merle grumbled while letting go of his nose. The bleeding had stopped. Emmaly snorted.  
"Then we're even now, _princess_."  
Merle tried to calm himself down, but he couldn't control himself and pushed her away from him when she called him that.  
"Y'know, ya best be grateful for havin' a pretty face, or else I already would've_ killed_ ya by now."  
Emmaly rolled her eyes and walked to the backpack to get two cans of food.

They were eating in silence and there was obviously a tension now between them. Merle's nose was still red with dry blood and Emmaly only looked down at her can with food. When they both finished their cans, they threw the remains in the fire.  
Merle sighed and judged himself for not leaving this girl already, especially after the way she called him princess, not to mention that she had fucking punched him. But he realized he had done the same to her —_leaving her in Atlanta_, even though she saved his life right before that. It wasn't normal for Merle to actually look after someone —_hell_, he won't let himself get attached to her that easily, but still, the girl had some serious survival skills. Which was uncommon for women. Well, at least for the women _he_ knew.  
"Ya can punch hard, 'ats for sure." His voice broke the silence, making Emmaly look up. She grinned and shook her head. "Ya have experience or what?"  
Emmaly's grin soon disappeared and she looked…_shocked_? Merle raised his eyebrows at her, wondering if he said something wrong.  
"I guess ye can say 'at," she replied softly. Merle wanted to say something but closed his mouth again. Emmaly looked down and chuckled darkly, like she was reliving some sort of memory.  
"Mah daddy wasnae exactly a good parent."  
Merle grinded his teeth, while his hands turned into fists. Her explanation made him remember his own father, who wasn't a good parent either.  
"I was adopted, had a good family 'n all that, an older brother which I adored, a dog and 'n both m' parents. However, mah momma left when I was 13 an' mah brother moved out as well. Mah daddy turned tae me, blamin' me for makin' mah momma leave."  
She sighed before continuing her story.  
"He laid his hands oan me in differen' ways 'n all _that_." Emmaly peeped up at him, but Merle was only staring in the flames, trying to control his anger. After a while he looked up, still wondering why she would have the experience of punching a man.  
"_He was a dumb ass._ Figured I teach him a lesson before leavin' th' house." She chuckled and shook her head. Merle laughed as well while realizing he was gaining more respect for her.  
"Well darlin, ya did a good job doin' 'at." He smiled and rubbed his nose.

* * *

_**Emmaly**_  
She wasn't sorry for her action at all. _He definitely deserved it,_ she thought, while looking at the man across from her. Emmaly stood up to get her backpack and grabbed a water bottle before walking over to Merle.  
"Ya gon' punch me again?"  
Emmaly snorted at his comment and laughed before kneeling down next to him. She grabbed her shirt and tore a piece off of it. Merle only watched in confusion, until she twisted the cap off to soak the piece of cloth with water. Emmaly took the cloth and gently scrubbed the blood off of Merle's face. He was utterly surprised and startled at her touch at first, but didn't say or do anything to stop her. His eyes followed her movements and he coughed.  
"Darlin', ya really wanna waste th' water to clean a face thats gon' stay ugly anyway?"  
Emmaly grinned and continued.  
"Ye know, I ain't sorry fur punchin' ye at all, Merle—" Her fingertips pressed against his cheek slowly so he would turn around. "—Coz ye were a complete asshole back there in Atlanta." She heard Merle chuckle under his breath. "But I sincerely hope we can forgit that now an' move on now 'at I showed ye mah feelings about 'at." Her eyes locked his for a moment while nodding at his nose. Merle laughed and sighed.  
"Now girl, _don' start beggin' on me now_." Emmaly snorted and shook her head.  
"Just wan' stay alive, figured we might as weel travel together fur a lil' while. Havin' a companion wood be a lil' easier, dorn't ye think?" She didn't get a reaction from him, but she knew he agreed with her.  
When his face was clean from the blood, she made eye contact.  
"Best tae look if it ainae broken 'r somethin'," she said before examining his nose. "This might hurt a lil'," she smirked, before touching his nose.  
"Don' worry sugar, 'm used t' it now." Merle said, before hissing under Emmaly's touch.  
"Fuck." He muttured. Emmaly chuckled and let go. "The fuck girl, ya some sort of nurse 'r what?"  
Emmaly leaned back to give Merle some space.  
"Somethin' like 'at. Mah momma was." He only nodded in response.  
"It ain't broken." She said before looking around her, to make sure there were no walkers, even though she already knew they were alone. Probably just an excuse to avoid eye contact, because she didn't like to talk about her past. _The past is called the past for a reason. No need to bring that shit up again._  
"Best t' check out 'at wound as well, Emmaly."  
The sound of her name made her shiver. Sometimes she didn't feel human in a world like this. And after all this time being alone, it was odd to hear someone say her name.  
She looked at Merle. "_Please_, call m' Ems. I dorn't like Emmaly."  
Merle nodded and looked at her head. Emmaly touched the wound and hissed because of the pain, causing Merle to laugh. He picked up the cloth and threw it towards her.  
"Ya better clean it, don' wan' get it infected 'r somethin'. We ain't got meds." Emmaly nodded and did so.  
There was a long silence between them, but it wasn't uncomfortable or awkward. They both needed to process everything that had happened between them so far. Both Emmaly and Merle weren't exactly the communicative type of people and even having to travel together would be a complete new thing, considering they were both stubborn as hell.  
Emmaly stood up and staggered towards her backpack once again to get the pack of cigarettes. She grinned and sat down again before pulling a cigarette out of the pack and lit it.  
"Ye know, ye better get some rest soon," she muttered before throwing the pack and lighter to Merle, who only shrugged. But Emmaly raised her eyebrows at him.  
"We need tae get ourselves a bow or somethin' sae we can hunt. Figured we better get awa' as far as possible an' find one." While blowing out the smoke, she looked at Merle, waiting for his response.  
"We ain't know shit 'bout this place darlin', how'dya wann' do 'at?"  
She shrugged. "I dunnae. We'll think of somethin' in tha mornin'. Get some sleep, I'll keep watch."  
She winked at him, grabbed her knife and stood up to sit down near a tree. Merle smirked and finished his cigarette before lying down.  
Emmaly looked away, only focusing on their surroundings. But when she looked at Merle again, he was already snoring with his back turned towards her.


	7. Chapter 7

_**Merle**_

After a good night sleep, he instantly felt happier and stronger.  
He woke up to the sound of crackling leaves and he slowly opened his eyes, taking the time to adjust himself to the bright sunlight. Emmaly was still up and strolling around their camp, gathering some food and already packing, probably making sure to leave no trace nor evidence behind that they'd been here.  
He sat up straight and stretched his arms before following Emmaly's movements. The girl looked tired and she was caked with dirt, causing Merle to curse at himself for not offering her to switch watch. Being tired wouldn't be a good start of her day.  
"Mornin' Ems." He said with a raspy voice before standing up. The girl turned around, looking at him in surprise.  
"Goodmornin' tae you as well," she replied with a soft smile.  
Merle looked around before turning his gaze back to Emmaly.  
"So what's th' plan?" He wasn't sure if she had one, even though she noted it would be useful to fetch a bow somewhere. Merle agreed with that; hunting would be much easier, instead of having to go on runs every week. He didn't know this area, so he rather wanted to avoid running into other people. Merle didn't really trust people. And_ yet_, he was travelling with a girl who he only knew for about 4 days. But she saved him. And he saved her. They didn't have much time to 'get to know each other' and Merle figured that could wait. Surviving was their priority.  
"Well, I don' know this place ver'y well, I'm afraid. Haven' really bin here before. But I'm certain that if we walk northward, we will fin' a grocery."  
Merle looked up and shook his head to clear the current thoughts. Emmaly threw a granola bar to him and Merle raised his eyebrows.  
"That supposed t' be my breakfast?" He said with an indignant undertone. Emmaly grinned before throwing a pack of crackers to him and she nodded at the water bottle that was lying next to him. Merle only grumbled in response before tearing the package from the granola bar.  
"And why ya so certain 'bout that grocery, hm?" He didn't look away before she replied.  
"Well, I saw a map when I was in Atlanta, an' I hae a good memory." She chuckled and hoisted the backpack on her back. "Hurry up princess, we better gie movin'."  
Merle sighed deeply, trying to ignore the fact that she had the balls to call him that again. He didn't say anything, but simply stood up and grabbed the water bottle.  
"Bitch."  
"_Asshole._"  
He looked up at her, but when she let out a laugh he only scowled, smirked and walked next to her, saying to himself that he shouldn't take it seriously anymore. Even though it was _annoying_ as_ fuck_.  
They continued walking at fast pace for 2 hours straight without pausing. Every now and then they would talk, but they figured they'd better be quiet to avoid attracting any walkers or other unwanted visitors.  
Merle looked at the ground, to make sure he wouldn't step on any large rocks, but also looked around occasionally, to make sure the surrounding was safe and clear. However, the farther they got into the woods, the more dense it became; the trees were closer and there were more bushes growing around them. This was probably a good thing, since the trees could cover them in case anything would happen.  
When he heard a strange noise, he quickly grabbed Emmaly's upper arm and laid a finger on his lips, implying her to stay quiet. She only nodded, understanding what he meant and took the knife from her belt. Merle looked around again, scanning the area for any walkers or humans. Without saying anything, he pushed Emmaly behind a bush and followed her. They both sat down and tried to stay out of sight while they waited for someone or something to show up.  
And after a few minutes, the source of the noise showed up.  
A walker appeared from behind a tree and tottered towards their direction. However, he didn't see Merle or Emmaly and simply kept moving forward.  
Merle felt how tensed Emmaly had become; she was clutching her knife tightly before raising it up. When he realized what she was about to do he grasped her wrist and squeezed it. Her eyes immediately turned to him. Merle noticed there was something in her eyes—an emotion that he couldn't place. He only shook his head in order to keep her still and she only nodded once before staring back at the walker again.  
_And he'd done the right thing_.  
When the walker was out of sight and they both wanted to stand up, 3 other walkers revealed themselves. Merle cursed in thought and pushed Emmaly down again. He cringed and observed the situation. But when he tried to come up with a plan to get them out of here, more walkers appeared.  
A herd.  
_A fucking herd._  
Probably about 30 walkers were following each other and Merle felt relieved when he realized they were just passing through. Though he still hoped the walkers wouldn't see or smell them.  
When he quickly glanced over to Emmaly, he noticed she was relaxed again. She caught his glance and smiled slightly to confirm she was alright. He nodded once in response and returned his attention to the walkers again.  
The only thing they could do was wait and hope they would go away soon; the last thing Merle wanted was having to stay here in the darkness, since the walkers became more active at night. And the fact that there was a herd passing through made it more likely that even more walkers would follow.

It seemed like an eternity before all the walkers were out of sight.  
They had likely waited for two hours, even though it wasn't really necessary—but they wanted to make sure that _all_ the walkers were gone.  
Merle and Emmaly were both careful and sharp-eyed; far as they knew, there could be more walkers lurking around.  
He stood up and stretched his limbs that'd become stiff from remaining in the same position for so long. The noise beside him confirmed that Emmaly had come out of her hiding as well. They made eye contact for a little while before Emmaly looked away. However, Merle's glance lingered on her for a moment, wondering why she had that pathetic look on her face when they saw the first walker. Maybe she just got scared for some reason._ Pussy_, he murmured in thought. He decided to let it rest for now, not wanting to bother her after the situation they just had. Today was bad enough already. Sure, Merle had prepared himself to kill a bunch of walkers, but a fucking _herd_ wasn't exactly part of the plan.  
There was a silence between Merle and Emmaly. Both were probably lost in thoughts when they continued their journey, asking themselves what to do next if something like this would happen again. But Merle was satisfied with his rapid reaction. He couldn't imagine what would have happened if he hadn't noticed the sound that quickly.  
"I think we're nearin' th' edge," he heard a soft voice say out of the sudden.  
"Yeah? Why d'ya think tha'?" His eyes were still focused on the ground and area around them, still not feeling very convinced about the whole herd situation. _Better to look out instead of riskin' a damn ambush._  
"Less bushes an trees." Merle figured her statement made sense.  
"Well the sooner we get outta here th' better," he rasped in return. "Don't'cha think?" Maybe he only asked her so he could look at her, to see how she was doing. Emmaly only nodded in response.

The sun was starting to disappear behind the clouds and slowly but surely darkness welcomed them.  
They had walked for another three hours and were now exhausted as hell.  
"We better get settled for the night." Merle said while looking around, trying to find a good tree that would cover them. Emmaly nodded.  
When they found a good spot, they both sat down against the tree. Emmaly took two cans out of her backpack and handed one over to Merle. They both ate their meal in silence.  
When they were finished, Emmaly took the cans and put them in her backpack, since she couldn't throw them into the fire. Making a fire wouldn't be a good plan in the first place.  
Merle looked up in the sky, noticing that it was very clear tonight and the stars were showing.  
He sighed.  
"The fuck 's yer problem, girl?"  
He turned around so he could see her face.  
And she had**_ that_** look again.


	8. Chapter 8

_**Emmaly**_  
His question was certainly unexpected and it even startled her. Not knowing what to reply, she simply grasped a twig from the ground and tore it apart to keep her hands busy while trying to find the right words. After 10 minutes or so, she looked up, only to meet Merle's questioning gaze.  
"Ya better realize I ain't a fuckin'_ therapist_, Scotty." He grumbled, before letting out a long sigh.  
Emmaly swore she heard a hint of annoyance in his voice, which only made her roll her eyes in response. She cleared her throat before replying.  
"Yoo're nae very helpin', ye know."  
Merle sighed again and raised his eyebrows at her. "Like I said, I _ain't_ a goddamn therapist. If ya came with me to discuss ya _pretty lil' girly problems_ with me, ya best be go 'n save someone else's sorry ass."  
Emmaly snorted. "Ye obvioosly watched too much Dr Phil," she snapped, not understanding where the sudden mood swing had come from. "So why bother askin' if yoo're gonna be a dick about it anyway?"  
Her voice suddenly sounded heavier and she tried to distance herself from Merle when she realized he was way too close to her. She noticed how Merle froze at her words.  
"So ya dumb whinin' won't get us killed any time soon!" The way he said it made her shiver to the bone and she got up, throwing her hands in the air.  
"Well if ye think I'm such a burden, then why 'r ye still here?!"  
Merle seemed to become angrier within seconds, but Emmaly didn't care. _What the fuck was up with this discriminatin' redneck-ish piece of shit?_  
Honestly, she knew Merle would be trouble. Or _cause_ trouble. And somewhere in the back of her mind she knew there was a chance he would be like this, even though she hoped he wouldn't.  
Merle tried to open his mouth to say something, but Emmaly wasn't finished yet. _Hell_— she would make him listen, even if it would ended up making him kill her for it.  
"Oh wait, I think I already know the answer. Ye probably thooght ye cood fuck me, well breakin' news _princess_, that ain't happenin'. I'm nae th' kind of woman ye think I am. I dorn't e'en know yer past relationship wi' th' other gender, but nae every fuckin' woman is th' same,-"  
Before she could even continue or finish, he'd already lifted himself up on his feet to get to her. She couldn't even react before she heard the sound of slapping flesh and the stinging pain that followed. He used so much force that her head snapped sideways.  
Emmaly reached her cheek and laid her fingertips on the burning spot before daring to look at Merle again. She knew she'd gone too far, but when she noticed the bloodlust in his eyes, she took a few steps back. Fear took over when he took a few steps forward again, causing Emmaly to freeze on the spot.  
Her cheek was still burning underneath her touch when Merle leaned forward, his head only a few inches removed from hers.  
"Ya crossed th' line, _Scotty_." He grunted with his lower voice. "I tried to do what ya asked, back in Atlanta, to '_swallow my pride'_."  
Suddenly, his hand grabbed her shirt and she felt the cold metal on her exposed neck. "—But I_ ain't_ here to make_ friends_. We agreed to stick together fo' survivin' and that's exactly what we're gonna do. But if ya ain't start showin' me some _goddamn_ respect, ya best sleep with tha' cute lil' gun of yours under ya pillow."

And just like that, he was gone again.  
_He was really gone._  
She wasn't sure how long she was standing there— it could be 1 minute, it could be 1 hour; she had no idea.  
She was squeezing her eyes together, trying to see through the darkness, but she didn't see any movement at all. But somehow that made her feel relieved.

_She had crossed the line._

Her ego came crashing down all at once. After being alone on the road for at least 2 months, she didn't expect having to deal with someone else's personality. _And what kind of personality_, Emmaly grumbled to herself in thought. She sat down, with trembling legs, before grabbing her backpack to get one of her blankets.

* * *

_When she'd raided a house in a random neighbourhood 3 weeks ago, she'd chuckled to herself when she found the 3 blankets. When she'd decided to stay in the house for the night and moved herself to the roof to keep watch, she then realized how stubborn she actually was for not taking the soft blankets with her. But, she was grateful for the fact that she hadn't left yet. The thought of having to sleep in a forest, —_like her current situation,_ without having any kind of cloth to keep her warm, had made her eyes roll and hiss in thought. Eventually she took the blankets with her and thanked the odds for running into this house._

* * *

She smiled at the memory and tugged the blanket over her cold and shivering body, until she realized there wasn't single reason to smile. The realization of what just happened between her and her companion, made her bite her lip to stop the stinging feeling behind her eyes. She knew it was somehow_ her_ fault. Even though Merle had been an asshole, she'd started about his 'past relationships' with other women.

Her cheek was already starting to swell and she was sure it would turn purple within a few minutes. _Thank god he didn't **actually** punch me_, she said to herself in thought before laying the backpack under her head.  
Merle wasn't back yet, but something told her that he needed to calm down. His words and threat were still burning in her mind.

_'Ya best sleep with tha' cute lil' gun of yours under ya pillow.'_

Her gun had only 3 bullets left. Maybe more, maybe even less.  
Her knife was still in her belt and she quickly took the belt off so she could get the knife. There was also a small knife on her leg strap, but she only used it for real emergencies.  
_But wasn't his threat a real emergency?_ Was he capable of _actually_ hurting her, as in, worse than the way he had hit her?  
Emmaly sighed and tried to shake the thoughts off.  
She wasn't exactly in a safe position right now; Merle wasn't here to keep watch and they only had a few trees that towered over their camping spot to offer them a little shelter. But if there would be walkers out there and they would smell her, she probably wouldn't stand a chance anyhow.  
But she was way too tired to worry about that. _If it happens, let it happen._  
She snorted and tried to keep her eyes open for at least another 20 minutes, but they became heavier and soon she drifted off in a deep sleep.


	9. Chapter 9

_**Merle**_  
_Embarrassed_. That was how he felt when his hand made contact with her cheek,  
When he walked away from her, he immediately knew he made a terrible mistake. Hell, he made a promise he wouldn't hit a woman. Of course, he yelled at them occasionally when they got on his nerves, but he would never lay a _finger_ on them without permission. Ofcourse, he grabbed their asses sometimes if he wanted to, but_ hitting_ them…That was out of the question.  
_He broke his promise._

Though he wasn't sure about his threat, he knew she needed to shut up from now on, because Merle knew it was hard to control himself sometimes.  
The blood was running through his veins like electricity and the fact that he felt guilty about it made it even more difficult for him to calm down. _Girl should've just kept her damn mouth shut,_ he thought.

* * *

_"Momma, why 's Daddy screamin'?" He sat on his Momma's lap, clinging to her arm and peeping up at her. While her eyes were filled with fear, she glanced down at him for a second before looking up at the door that was muffling his Daddy's screaming._  
_"Momma, I'm scared."_  
_"Sssh now baby, ain't nothin' gonna happen to ya as long as I'm here. Cover ya ears, darlin'." Her fingers gently stroked through the toddler's ruffled hair, while her other one was laying on her plumped belly. The toddler only nodded and did as his Momma said._  
_His body was filled with fear. Fear and questions. Why did he do this to her? **Why?** He was probably too young to understand. He was only 3 and a half then, when he occasionally would see the blue stains on his Momma's arms, or even a black eye. But he never knew why. Eventually he knew his Daddy must have had something to do with it, but he couldn't do anything about it or try to stop it._

_Sometimes his Daddy would yell at him, and his Momma would explain about the 'alcohol', even though he never fully understood what it was and why his Daddy used it. _  
_'Why does Daddy need that stuff when he has us? And when the baby gets here, will he be happy again?' He would say, leaving his mother with watered eyes. But she would bite her lip and shook her head at that._

_Her fingers tapped on his shoulder and he looked up to his Momma then, realizing there was soft comforting smile playing around her lips. _  
_"It's okay baby, it's over now." She carefully cupped his cheek and pressed a kiss on his temple. "Now darlin', look at me," she forced him while her voice sounded strict and more serious. He did so and looked up into her light blue eyes. "Ya gotta promise me somethin'. And ya gotta keep that promise until you'll be gone." Her thumb caressed his cheek and he looked at her in confusion. "Momma, what'dya mean, 'until I'm gone'?" His Momma looked down at the ground then, letting out a heavy sigh before piercing his eyes with hers again._  
_"Until the day you die."_

_Death. He was scared, just like every other kid of his age would be, and he wasn't even sure what to think about it._  
_His lip was trembling and he felt the liquid burn behind his eyes. His Momma's eyes changed into a harsh look. _  
_"Don't," she only said with a tensed voice. "Don't ya cry. Crying makes ya look weak, baby. The world's gon' get heavier on your shoulders when yer older. Best not to show them your fear now darlin'. Did ya ever see ya Momma cry when,-" she couldn't finish. She must've realized her son must've seen his Daddy hit her._  
_She looked down at her son, who only nodded. "I promise I won't Momma," he said. But his Momma shook her head. _  
_"No baby, that's not what I want ya to promise me. I want ya to promise me, that you won't do bad things." Now it was her son's turn to look tensed and confused. _  
_"..Bad things? I ain't doing bad things Momma, I only stole a cookie from the neighbor, but please don't tell Santa."_  
_Her mom chuckled slightly. "No boy, ya need to promise me that you won't hurt people, especially not girls. Ya gotta be sweet to them, 'kay? If they ever need yer help like Mommy needs help to get away from Daddy.. You gotta give it t' them, alrigh'?"_  
_Her son nodded and grinned. "Girls 'r stupid though." he muttured. His Momma laughed and playfully pinched his cheek._

* * *

_She wasn't here right now._ No, she set herself on fire and left him and his little baby brother with that godless drinking bastard.

He scowled at himself and his thoughts as he turned around to head back towards their camp. He wasn't exactly sure about how long he had been out, but according to the moon it must've been quite a few hours. And yet he didn't know what to do.  
Apologizing was the last thing he wanted to do._ Fuckin' ain't gonna happen._ Hell, he didn't even want to talk about it, he just wished he could undo his actions somehow, but he know he couldn't. Ignoring the whole thing could be a second option, but he didn't know how the girl would take it. Did he hit her that hard in the first place? His head was filled with questions and assumptions, but he tried to let it slide as he walked back as quietly as possible.  
When he finally returned, he noticed the backpack was gone. He growled to himself; he was annoyed with himself but also with the damn girl. Surely her ego could take a small slap to the face? Or had Merle wrongly estimated her?  
However, when he stepped forward, he noticed the little black spot moving up and down with a sighing sound. He noticed she was shaking, either from emotions or cold.  
_Fuck if I know_, he thought while he walked towards her and bowed over her to examine the damage he'd done.  
Merle wasn't good with either emotions or feelings of other people. The only person who he truly cared about, even though he didn't really show or admit it, was his little brother. The guilt of leaving him alone with their piece-of-shit father was still aching inside, but he never got to talk about it; Daryl was exactly the same when it came to feelings. They never spoke about what happened while Merle was away, though Merle had a suspicious feeling about what _could_ have happened while he was gone. But he never had the balls to directly ask Daryl about it. He didn't even know how to fucking bring that topic up in the first place.

Her face was calm and relaxed, even though she was frowning every now and then. She was resting her head on her arms and her backpack was lying next to her. Merle grabbed the backpack and took two of the blankets and silently put them over her. The place where he'd hit her was red, but he wasn't exactly sure; the darkness made it hard for him to see. Merle turned around to sit down at the nearest tree. He hoped he didn't hit her hard enough that the spot would turn purple or blue. A sigh escaped his lips as he watched the girl peacefully. His gaze turned to the sky.

_'If they ever need yer help like Mommy needs help to get away from Daddy.. You gotta give it t' them, alrigh'?'_  
_'Girls 'r stupid, though.'_  
_'But there might be one who will need yer help, if she's alone or needs protection. Ya gon' learn how t' be a gentleman, Merle. One day you'll understand baby. Just promise me.'_

He looked at Emmaly.

_'I'll promise, Momma.'_


	10. Chapter 10

_**TW: Includes sexual intimidation/violence. Putting **** as a trigger warning at the specific part. Do not read if you're affected easily by sexual violence-ish things. You won't miss much if you skip the chapter.**_

* * *

_"I'm gonna win, just accept it." The satisfying undertone in her voice was obviously annoying her older brother. "Nat, ye seriously suck at this game." Said the 10-year old girl, wanting to push her brother's buttons a little more._

_"Oh Ems, why ya gotta rub it 'n my face like tha'?" Her brother was gazing at the small TV in front of them, his eyebrows furrowing with frustration. The tension between them was too amusing to Emmaly and she pressed the buttons on her gaming console. But suddenly in the game, her car crashed, causing her brother Nathan to burst out in laughter. "Ya gotta big mouth, missy. Looks like karma really caught yo ass." His voice was toned with an heavy southern accent. Unlike Emmaly, who had managed to keep her old Scottish accent intact. The differences between them made them unique as a brother and sister, and was one of the reasons why they'd become best friends after Nathan's parents adopted Emmaly._

_Emmaly was only 3 when her own mother died of cancer and her father left her at an orphan house. It almost seemed like destiny wrote itself when Nathan and his parents were on a holiday in Scotland and visited the small town Garve when they met Emmaly. There was an old ancient church next to the orphan house that Nathan and his parents were visiting. Emmaly herself visited the church often, she was only 9 years old at that time, when she prayed to Him to find her a family. Nathan heard the little girl praying and motioned his parents to come. His mother was after the birth of Nathan unable to get any more children for some medical reason. Nathan, who was 11, befriended the girl in no-time and the rest of the story wrote itself from there; Nathan and his parents took Emmaly with them back to Georgia._

_"Yeah, yeah. Ye made ye point Nat. I'm gonnae sleep. G'night." The girl laid down the gaming console and stood up. "Night Ems," her brother replied before standing up aswell. Emmaly left her brother's room and went to the bathroom to brush her teeth. When she made her way towards her bedroom, she did so as quietly as possible. It's been only 3 months since their mom and dad divorced and ever since then their ol' man was acting very strange. He would drink to get as drunk as possible, but Nathan assured Emmaly he'd be alright eventually. 'Give him some time,' he had said to her when she asked her older brother about him. _

_But the last month had been different. Their father would get drunk as usual, but one night he went to Emmaly's room. She pretended to be asleep then, assuming he was drunk again. She was right; the strong scent of alcohol he brought along into her room almost made her gag. However she pretended to be asleep while she tried to find out what her father was up to. He didn't do anything; he simply stood there and.. watched her. It was very odd, and honestly; it freaked Emmaly out. Only 10 minutes later, she felt his rough hands stroking her hair, before she heard him leaving her room._

_Emmaly laid down in her bed and turned the light switch off. She closed her eyes, exhausted from today; she and Nathan had gone to the mall to buy a new game and get a hamburger. When they got home, they played the game together for 4 hours straight. Emmaly had told her older brother about school and about how she felt left out because she wasn't 'girly enough'. Nathan only laughed and told her to stop worrying about it and that she was nice enough to hang out with. This eased her insecurities and they continued to stroll around the mall for another hour._

_The doorknob was squeezing and she felt her heart throb in her chest because of the sudden sound. She didn't want to move around and see what is was; if it was Nathan, she wouldn't have a problem. But if it was her dad.._

_Her thoughts were confirmed when she heard the wavering footsteps. Their father. She didn't move because she was too afraid to do so as she listened to his moving. The door closed and she tried to think of something else._

* * *

_********__He indeed was drunk again. The scent was too strong to ignore as her father staggered towards her bed. Suddenly, she felt his warm body press to hers as he laid down next to her. His hand stroked her cheek and Emmaly bit her lip. "Sssh s'alrigh' baby girl," he whispered with a confusing undertone. Emmaly didn't response; she was practically frozen to do anything. Her father's hands grabbed both her arms and turned her around to face him. Emmaly opened her eyes. "Daddy?" She said, anticipating. Her father's eyes seemed lost.. Like he wasn't himself anymore. It almost seemed like he'd turned into some kind of animal. Her father didn't say anything, just kept staring at her. "Ye alrigh'?" Emmaly tried again, trying to hide her fear. _

_********__He pressed her against him, his lips moving to her temple as he pressed several kisses there. "S'alrigh," he whispered, while his hand grabbed hers. "Daddy, ye hurtin' me." Emmaly said, trying to yank her hand back that he grasped to tightly. Suddenly her hand felt the textile underneath it and her eyes widened when she noticed where he'd pressed her hand on. _

* * *

_That night was the most horrific night of her life; her own dad making her do those things was something she never thought would've happen. But it was only the beginning of a so called routine; every week he'd come to her room, drunk and sometimes high, traumatizing his own daughter. Emmaly was too afraid to talk about it and so it kept going on like for atleast 4 years. She tried to talk about it to her teacher, but she was simply too scared to do so._

_She wanted to tell Nathan so badly, but she was afraid he wouldn't believe her. Or even worse; that he would actually __**hate**__ her for saying such things about his biological father. And so she remaint silent, crying herself to sleep at first, but after a few times she'd gotten used to it and only remaint depressed._

_But one night.. _

_She was 13, about to turn 14 the next week. Her father came to her room again and things gotten out of hand. He went too far, and it was then when Emmaly cried and sobbed when her dad had left. Her dad usually came at night, mostly 3 or 4 AM._

_It was then when Nathan had woken up because of her loud sobbing._

_He found her, naked, while clutching her pillow. The empty whiskey bottle next to her bed was obvious enough for Nathan to realise what happened. _

_Nathan grabbed a blanket out of her closet to cover his sister up with, assuming she didn't want to lay under the filthy duvet. He placed her onto his lap and stroked her hair, comforting his little sister and cradling her in his arms. 'I'm here Ems, no one 's gon' hurt ya now.' _

_Emmaly had calmed down, realising the rough hands didn't belong to her father, and Nathan's voice soothed her. She'd peeped up to her older brother then. "I'm sorry," she whispered, while her brother was still rocking her. _

_Nathan was 16 and old enough to understand everything. He felt guilty, because he knew their father was an alcoholic for a long time now. 'How long?' his rasping voice asked. Emmaly had bitten her underlip. 'Couple o' years,' she forced herself to say, causing Nathan to freeze on the spot. 'But it was never__** this**__ bad,' Emmaly explained. Nathan was shocked when he figured what might've happened. But Emmaly seemed to realize this aswell; tears started falling down her eyes again while she felt filthier than ever._

_Nathan picked her up and carried his little sister to the shower. He had given her a bath, not caring about seeing her naked. Her sister didn't seem to care either since she was still too shocked about everything that'd happened._

_Nathan helped her dress afterwards and carried her to his bedroom. He laid her into his bed and pressed a kiss on her forehead. "Sleep," he only said. "I'll protect ya. Don' worry." Emmaly gazed at her brother. "Please dorn' go Nat," she begged. Nathan only nodded and sat down at the chair opposite the bed. When he made sure Emmaly was asleep, he left the room as silent as possible._

_He went downstairs and found his father passed out on the couch, snoring loudly. Nathan slammed on his dad's shoulder, causing him to jump up. "Nathan.." His dad rasped, sitting up. Nathan's eyes widened with anger. "What'dya do to her, ya lil' piece of worthless shit?!"_

_His dad was utterly shocked and surprised at once. "You fuckin' cunt, what'dya do to Emmaly?!" He said, pointing his finger at his father with an accusing, furious look. His dad understood what he meant. "I'm sor,-" "Don't ya give me that crap ol' man, I know what ya did t' her, ya fuckin' moron!"_

_After his last sentence he punched his father with full force on the nose, causing his dad to fall back on the couch and grasping his nose. "Ya- Fuckin'- worthless- piece- of- shit!" He ended every word with a punch and he kept going on afterwards. His dad was barely conscious, but Nathan made sure he was keeping his eyes open. "Yer a fuckin' worthless father fo' doin' that shit to ya own bloody daughter. I hope ya rot in hell. Ya should be ashamed of ya'self! Me and her are leavin' tonigh' while you can jus' lay here left t' die for all I care!"_

_He punched his dad another few times before going upstairs and waking Emmaly up. They both packed their stuff and Nathan grabbed all the money and long-lasting food he could find. He took the tent that they used for camping aswell as the sleeping bags._

_When he and Emmaly were downstairs, Nathan grabbed his sisters' hand. "Look at me," he whispered gently. "Ya only gonn' look at me, ya understand? I want ya t' keep lookin' at me 'til I tell ya otherwise, 'kay?"_

_Emmaly only nodded and they made their way out of the house, leaving their once-so-safe-haven behind and never looking back._


	11. Chapter 11

_**Merle**_

The following days had been awkward and uncomfortable.

They travelled in silence and only spoke to eachother when it was strictly neccessary. And even then, Merle wished he could just leave her behind. Sometimes he would cast her a glance, to see how she was doing, but she seemed to be doing just fine.

Sometimes he wondered what would have happened if he had left her behind in Atlanta. He thought it would be easier, but he thought that only because of what happened 2 weeks ago.

* * *

_**Emmaly**_

They managed to find a grocery store in a nearby town and they had now enough food for atleast a month, if they were lucky and thrifty.

Emmaly heaved a sigh and turned around. Her left arm, that was holding a knife, was raised in case a walker would appear. They were at a gas station and Merle was looking for a car, while Emmaly was searching for some things in the store they could use or that would come in handy. It didn't make sense, since they had enough supplies for now, but Emmaly insisted to look anyhow. Maybe it was a simple excuse to be away from Merle and to have some privacy to clear her thoughts.

Last night, Merle had disappeared for no reason. Emmaly had already started to feel like he was tired and annoyed by her and so he wouldn't come back, but after two hours she heard the familiar muffled footsteps. When she looked up at him, something in his eyes had changed; they were red and bigger than usual. She already had an uncomfortable feeling, so she didn't say anything about it.

_He_ did, however.

_'Aye sugar, ya wann' bump som' uglies?' _

_She sat up straight and scowled at him. The memory of how they first met was crossing her mind. 'Why, 'r ye nae capable of usin' ye own hands?' she fired back at him with a playful look on her face. Merle chuckled at this—the kind of chuckle that seemed unrealistic. It was dark and filled with several emotions which Emmaly could not recognize. But when he sat down, opposite of her on his own blanket, his eyes searched for hers. Something in that moment made Emmaly tremble. Was that _guilt _in his eyes? Why did he even seem to care about what happened?_

Even though they had known eachother for 3 weeks, Merle Dixon didn't exactly seem to be the caring-type-of-guy. He could easily ran off and live another day, yet it seemed that he had chosen to stay with her.

The door behind her opened and Emmaly turned around immediately while she had raised the knife higher. Merle held his hands up and looked at the knife that was pointed at his face. "Ho, slow down now sugar, don' get all _feisty_ with me." he said while he distanced himself from her. Emmaly lowered her weapon and rolled her eyes. "Cooldnae ye jist knock 'r somethin'?" she hissed in return, causing Merle to chuckle under his breath. "Now that would jus' ruin tha surprise, wouldn' it?" he replied. Emmaly shook her head and Merle snorted. "So—ya wann' hear tha good news, or 'r ya jus' gon' keep ya panties all twisted?"

Emmaly rubbed her eyes. "Spit it out," she murmered.

"Now_ that s_ounds excitin'." Merle said while grinning at her. She furrowed her eyebrows and looked at him. The fact that he was messing around with her like this, like he had done in the first two weeks, eased her a little. It almost seemed like they had put everything what happened behind them and Emmaly was glad. If it weren't for Merle, she would have gone insane because of the lack of human interaction. That seemed to be the only reason why Emmaly cared this much; _she was scared to be left alone_. After everything that happened to her since the world had gone to shit, Emmaly was scared, even though she was pretending that she wasn't. Her ego was just something she had to deal with, but she still regretted that night when she fired all the accusations and assumptions at him.

And then, Emmaly did something that surprised even_ her_.

She gently shoved his shoulder with a slight smile on her face. Even Merle seemed to be taken aback by this, because he looked at her in utter surprise. For a moment it seemed like he was going to say something, but he didn't and took the map out of his pocket instead. He cleared his throat.

Was he acting like this because women usually would punch a guy for saying stuff like that?

Emmaly chuckled under her breath._ This was Merle._ Sure, they weren't best friends and they probably would never be, but even an idiot in her place wouldn't take it seriously anymore. Besides, the world has gone to shit; courtesy was the least of her problems.

"—we can jus' go ta this town 'n see if there's anythin', or we can jus' go back to tha woods 'n stay there 's long 's possible."

Emmaly eyes widened. She pointed at his stump. The bandage was dark red, but the yellow crust underneath it had caught her attention. "Merle," she breathed while she was starting to feel nervous. "Why didn'e ye tell me?"

Merle saw the fear and panic in her eyes and followed her gaze. "Ah—this ol' thang? Ain' nothin' ta worry 'bout, sugar. Jus' a scratch." Merle explained as he shrugged. He tried to laugh it off, but Emmaly knew better. Infection could be very dangerous, and especially in a world like this when there weren't many antibiotics to treat it with. "It cood cost yer goddamn life! Is that why ye were pukin' yesterday an' lest week?"

_And the reason why you're looking so goddamn pale at the sudden_, she added in thought. Merle pressed his lips together. "Tellin' ya, it's _nothin_'." he grumbled while he continued to look at the map again. Emmaly shook her head and bit her lower lip. She couldn't handle another person's death. It almost made her feel if she were cursed; she had accepted a person into her life and again someone wanted to take them away from her.

Was this her punishment for the bad things she had done in order to survive? Was _God_ cutting her _down_?

Merle snapped his fingers in front of her eyes and Emmaly startled. "Ya ain' thinkin' 'bout all tha doom scenario's, are ya now sweetheart? How many times do I gotta bring it t'ya 'til ya understand? Ain' _nothin'_ gon' happen."

It it weren't for his frustration of trying to get through her, she would already been crying. Emmaly didn't cry a lot, but this was just her weak spot; the fear of losing someone.

He lifted her chin up with his hand. "Ems, dont'cha worry girl. Ol' Merle ain' gonna leave yer ass alone. Ya wouldn' make it two miles without me."

Emmaly scoffed at this. "Now dorn't ye get all cocky wi' me, mister Dixon." she replied as she slapped his hand away. Merle smirked and continued to explain their plan.

* * *

They had driven for 1 day; they had enough gas for now, but in the meantime Emmaly was looking on the map to see if there was any sign of a town somewhere so they could get some more. Their car, which was a black pick-up, was working pretty good except for the loud engine. But Merle had told Emmaly that it wouldn't be much of a problem.

He was driving and she was sitting next to him. The map was lying on her lap and she occasionally studied it to see if they were going the right way.

There was a silence between them, but it wasn't an uncomfortable one.

They stopped at a camping spot. Merle got out at the sudden without saying anything and Emmaly grabbed their two backpacks. When she got out, she was frozen on the spot.

The sound of him gagging made her shiver to the bone. She immediately remembered what happened yesterday and she felt like punching herself in the face. She quickly made her way over to Merle, but he held his hand up. After he threw up every single thing that he could possibly throw up, he turned around and looked at her. His face was pale and he flinched, probably from the pain. Emmaly bit her lip and wanted to come closer, but Merle held his hand up again. "Told ya, don' worry. Tomorrow it'll prol'ly be over."

Emmaly wanted to scream at him for being so naive, but she knew it was pointless since Merle would probably not give in nor admit that this was _serious._ She gripped her hair in frustration and turned around. "Best 'f we sleep in tha car tonigh'." Merle mumbled behind her.

Emmaly climbed into the backseat of the car, while Merle was sitting on the drivers' seat. They both drifted off to sleep without saying anything, since Emmaly was annoyed by Merle's attitude about all of this. She had tried to remember anything about infections, but her mind was numb. Her mother had often told her stories about her work at the hospital and Emmaly was certain that her mom had told her something about infections.

Emmaly promised herself to try again tomorrow, because she was too tired to function.

She woke up shivering from the cold that morning. Her nightmares caused her to feel even more tired than the night before, but she decided to get up anyway. Merle was still sleeping; his chest was rising softly and his mouth was slightly opened. Emmaly sat up straight and rubbed her eyes before tapping Merle on the shoulder. He didn't response, so she shook him gently. "Rise 'n shine, princess." she murmered with a chuckle, knowing he hated that. She realised she felt comfortable messing around with him and that made her feel a little bit happier.

He still didn't respond. She raised her eyebrows at first, until she realised what happened the day before. She laid her hand on his forehead and it was feeling way too hot.

The infection had spreaded.


	12. Chapter 12

Her feet was pushing the padel in even more. The last thing that was on her mind right now, was driving too fast. The whole world had already gone to shit, so the speed limit wouldn't matter anyway.

Adrenaline was rushing through her veins while she was focussing on the road, trying to read the map and talking to Merle all at once. He was lying next to her, still unconscious because of the infection. Emmaly felt like screaming and crying because her biggest nightmare had actually come to life_ again_, but she knew she had to save her mental breakdowns for later. Even though she was filled with panic and fear, she managed to get herself together and concentrate on driving to the nearest town.

The buildings were coming closer as she neared the place, but she was still unsure about everything. Was there a drugstore? _Did they have the necessary equipment and antibiotics?_ She knew how to clean, change and stitch up a wound, but pills were a different story.

Emmaly felt guilty and stupid for not paying attention to his wound. _4 weeks_, she thought bitterly. They had been travelling together for_ 4 weeks_ and she had never bothered to ask about how he was feeling physically. No, she always thought Merle was a tough _son of a bitch_ who wouldn't complain about pain or whatsoever, but she felt dumb for being so naive with herself. An infection could be deadly, no matter _who_ got it.

She drove into the town and glanced at Merle occasionally. "_Stay wi' me 'ere_," she exclaimed, trying to keep herself from panicking at the sight of his unmoving body and closed eyes. "Ye ainae gonnae leave me alone now, _asshole_." she continued while she knew it was pointless since he wouldn't hear her pleading. But she learnt from her mother that it was important to keep talking to your patients, even though they were completely off. "Ye _promised_ me ye wouldn'." she whispered defeated while squeezing her eyes together to hold back the stinging liquid behind her eyes. Truth was, what the fuck was she going to do if she would be left alone again? Would she be able to cope with herself?

Ofcourse, the relationship between her and Merle was weird and confusing, but Emmaly didn't regret saving him that day in Atlanta. She was happy to be able to communicate with another person again, but she was_ scared_. Scared to get too attached to someone and losing them in the end. Though she thought He would give her another chance, a new beginning—_one_ more shot to make it all right.

_Guess He's hard to convince._

"Yoo're nae gonnae leave 'coz of sum' pansy_ infection_, nae after I saved ye ass back there in Atlanta." she mumbled as she halted in front of what seemed to be a drugstore. She immediately got out and made sure all the car doors were closed before rushing to the door of the drugstore. After she had grasped the knife from behind her belt, she opened the door and tapped on the glass while her impatience was growing within minutes. No one and nothing responded to the noise and she quickly went inside. It had already been looted, she realized, as she took in the sight of the empty shelves and supplies that were scattered on the ground. Her hope was starting to fade away, but she forced herself to keep looking. She found a first aid kit and some other medical supplies, such as stitching equipment and bandage. But the thing she _really_ needed were the meds. She was relieved to see the pharmacy section in the back of the store and she quickly paced towards it.

Though all her hope was vanished, when she noticed the empty shelf where the antibiotics were supposed to be.

She clenched the knife that was still in her hand and laid her other hand on her forehead. The taste of iron was in her mouth thanks to her lipbiting and she felt like she was going to throw up. Feeling as hopeless as she did, she punched the empty glass case. Her hand was starting to bleed but she didn't care nor feel anything. She sat down on the ground with her head between her legs and sighed. Her eyes darted up when she heard the noise of falling glass, due to the punch. She followed the falling glass with her eyes and shrieked under her breath when she saw where it had fallen.

The broken glass was lying in front of the pharmacy counter, but it wasn't the counter that had drawn her attention. There were boxes in the counter and one had a sticker with 'medications, etc.' on it. She moved forward, not paying attention to the fact that her knees were resting in the shattered glass, and opened the box.

She closed her eyes and leant back.

"Thank you, God." she whispered while she looked up. She stood up with the box in her hand and searched for a bag. When she found one, she tossed all the pill containers into the bag, as well as the first aid kit and other supplies she had found. Without thinking, she grabbed the bag and ran outside.

The sudden groaning halted her; there they were, 5 walkers who had noticed their presence. Emmaly grasped the belt buckle and panicked when she didn't feel the familiar shape of the knife behind it. "Fuck," she cursed as she dropped the bag and ran back inside to find it. The walkers had already followed her inside and staggered towards her direction. She looked over her shoulder and calculated how much time she had left, and moved over to the pharmacy counter. When she saw the cullet on the ground, she grabbed a large piece and held it in her hands, which were both now bleeding. One walker was only a meter away from her and while she tried to concentrate, she moved forward and shoved the glass into the walkers right eye. It was long and hard enough to reach the brain and the walker fell on the ground with a loud _thud._ Satisfied with her impulsive idea, she moved back to the counter to gather more glass and repeat the process with the remaining walkers. After she had stabbed the next one, it collapsed over the previous dead one, leaving only 2 behind. Emmaly's heart was pounding and a few drops of sweat were running down her forehead. She stabbed the last two shortly after, and they were now lying on the ground on a pile. Emmaly leant on the counter with her arms, which were covered with walkers blood and her _own_ blood. She panted while her lungs were aching because of the lack of oxygen. Her body was still trembling from the leftover adrenaline and she moved through the store, still searching for the knife that she didn't want to leave behind.

When she finally found the knife on the medication supplies shelve, she walked to the front door again. After she made sure the coast was clear, she left the store, grabbed the bag and opened the car. She got in and closed the door firmly. "Merle, _I'm here,_" she whispered to his unconscious body, as she opened the bag and grabbed the antibiotics and painkillers. Her hands were shaking while she opened the cap of the container, and she tried to think of the right dose.

She realised she didn't have time for this; if she wanted to save him, she had to act _now_. Hesitating, she grabbed the water bottle from under her chair and opened it. She moved closer to Merle and tried to move him towards her. She let his head lean on her breast and she pressed the bottle of water into his slightly opened mouth. When she was sure that his swallowing reflexes were still working properly, she gently pushed the first pill into his mouth, along with some water. To her relief, he swallowed it normally without choking or whatsoever. She repeated the process with 4 other pills.

When he had swallowed all the pills that he needed, she unwrapped the bandage of his stump. The smell almost made her gag; it smelled like the dead people outside.

She started to clean the wound and she made sure all the pus was gone before stitching up the smaller wounds. Sometimes his body would tremble under her touch, but so far, everything was going exactly as planned. Soon as she was finished, she bandaged the wound. It seemed like he was already looking better because of the meds and clean bandage. Emmaly smiled slightly and leant back in satisfaction. There was nothing more she could do now, besides waiting for him to wake up. The fact that he hadn't died yet gave her hope; It almost seemed like she _did_ get a second chance to make things right.

Emmaly closed her eyes and fell asleep in no time.


	13. Chapter 13

The difference between being asleep and being awake is simple; when being asleep, you can simply drown yourself in your fantasies. Though these fantasies are hard to control or determine, so it's easy to slip away and lose yourself in the darkest corners of your mind. No one would be able to wake you up and if they would, all they could do is provide you more time. Time, until it'd be nighttime again and you would have to go to sleep eventually. Because how far are you going to get in an apocalyptic world where the dead are revived and killing the living, if you're exhausted by lack of sleep?

Ofcourse, not everyone has nightmares. Some people have the most beautiful dreams, where they live in a world or experience a story that will never be theirs. But the_ other_ group, the people who live the most horrifying lives inside their head.—

—Emmaly was one of those people.

It had been 2 days since she had given Merle the antibiotics, but nothing had changed; he was still out. _Atleast he's still alive_, she would say to herself when looking at him. She tried to give him plenty of water in the meantime, but she was too unsure about giving him food; she didn't want to risk getting him killed from suffocation.

After she had given him the medication, she had driven to the camping spot in the outer woods, the place where Merle hadn't woken up that morning. Emmaly had parked the car as far in the woods as possible so the trees would cover the pick-up. She had been exhausted; tired of running and fighting for _her_ life, and for the lives of her loved ones. Emmaly had looked at Merle, who was leaning with his head against the window with his eyes closed. Did _she_ consider _him_ as a loved one? _Probably just because he's the only one here,_ she had said to herself.

Emmaly opened her eyes slowly and gave herself some time to actually wake up. She tried to orient, like she did every morning, and remembered she was in an apocalypse. An apocalypse in which she had lost _everything_ and _everyone_.

But the person that she missed the most, was her brother. He had taken care of her and they looked out after each other. They had been a perfect team.

Emmaly rubbed her eyes and yawned. She turned around to look at Merle, whose eyes were still closed._ What if he dies?_

She hesitated before touching his forehead with the palm of her left hand._ Normal temperature._ _What the hell was taking so long?_ Worrying herself wouldn't help at all, she realised. She grabbed the bottle of water and took a few sips before turning towards Merle. She let him lean on her breast again, which had become quite a habit. It was simply the only way to hold him, without getting crushed by his body weight. He was _way_ bigger than her, even though Emmaly was a tall woman.

She gently lifted the bottle to his lips and he began to drink eagerly. His left hand suddenly grabbed the bottle and he clenched the water bottle. Was he so thirsty?

It struck her when she realised what was happening.

_He was moving._

She didn't say anything. The bottle was almost empty now, and for the first time in the past few days, Emmaly didn't know what to do._ This was a good sign, right?_

A grunt snapped her back to reality. She wanted to push him off her, but he suddenly leant back even more, causing Emmaly getting squashed into the seat. She felt him stir and his head suddenly turned around. "Cozy 'ere, ain' it?" he said with a grin. Emmaly's cheeks reddened and she pressed her lips together. She tried to push him off her, but she then realised he was doing it on purpose. "Git off me." she said. Merle's eyes lighted up with amusement at the sight of her blushing face, but he eventually lifted himself off her. Emmaly shoved back abruptly until her back touched the door. Merle turned around and let his back lean into the other door. "How long 's I out?" he rasped. Emmaly shook her head. "Probably aroond three days." she answered as she grabbed her backpack. Merle growled to himself and looked at his stump, that had a new clean bandage. He squeezed his eyes together when he saw the empty pill container on the ground. "Ya alrigh'?"

Emmaly gave him 3 granola bars, which Merle accepted willingly. She opened a can of peaches and shrugged in response. "Aam alive. How are ye feelin' yeself?" she replied while taking out half a peach before she handed over the can to Merle. When he shrugged, Emmaly scowled at him.

"An' dorn't shit around wi' me this time, or I will cut off th' other hand as well. Ye scared th' shit outta me." she snapped.

Merle chewed thoughtfully on a peach and frowned. "Pipe tha fuck down, sugar. Told ya I'd come back." he sneered at her. Emmaly pierced her blue eyes into his. "Nae after I saved yer ass after almost gettin' myself killed in order tae get th' fuckin' meds." she protested in return. Merle lowered his gaze to the ground and continued to eat in silence. Emmaly shook her head in disbelief when he refused to reply, and opened the car door.

"Stupid bitch," she heard him say, before she slammed the car door behind her. She grabbed the knife from behind her belt and strolled off into the forest.

The sound of rustling leaves eased her mind, but she was still furious. All the effort she had done to keep him alive._ And for what,_ she thought mockingly. It felt pretty much the same like how he had acted towards her back in Atlanta. _No gratitude_. But did she want gratitude? All she wanted, was to keep him alive. He was a living _human_, just like her, and she was sure that two people would be better off than one. Someone to look after, but also someone who would look after her.

But was _he_ looking after _her_?

Emmaly continued to walk further into the forest.

Merle had left her alone to die after the ambush in the city. After Emmaly had risked _her_ life to save _his_. Yet he ran off.

But he came back.

Still, she thought it would have been better if they had never met in the first place. _Save m'self som' problems_, she scoffed in thought. For some reason she hoped, that when she would return to the car, he would have gone away. Though another part of her dearly hoped he hadn't; the part of her that was afraid to be left alone.

Emmaly stopped when she heard the familiar groaning and moaning. She looked up, and saw 3 walkers staggering forward. They had noticed her and Emmaly took the knife from behind her belt, while heaving a sigh. She waited until the first one would try to grab her, and stabbed it right into its head. It fell down. However, Emmaly hadn't noticed the second one from behind. It grabbed her hair and she suddenly felt the sharp nails on her bare shoulder. She forced back a scream, since she didn't want to attract any other walkers, and turned around to stab the walker in its right eye. When she turned around _again,_ she faced the last walker that was dangerously close now. She reached forward and stabbed it aswell.

When the three of them were all 'dead', she was wheezing for air. Her arm was hurting and when she looked at it, she started to gag. The skin was torn open and revealed the perfect scratch of a human hand. A little part of what seemed to be muscle was visible. The wound was bleeding heavily, and she quickly tore off a piece of her shirt. She pressed it against the wound and cried out from pain.

_Keep walking_, she told herself while heading back to the car. _Just a few more steps_. The most important question that was occupying her mind right now, was whether she was going to die or not. Did she get infected?_ Could a scratch infect you?_ She digged through her memories, but didn't remember anything about dying from a scratch. Though she realised then, she had never met someone during the apocalypse who was scratched by a walker.

Emmaly bit her lower lip to prevent herself from crying, while she walked up the hill to the car. She opened the door with the hand from her uninjured arm.

_He wasn't here._

The place where he had lain the last 3 days was now empty. _Once again left alone._

_What do I do now?_ she thought desperately when she grabbed the first aid kit. When she tried to open it with both hands, blood started to flow over her once so white shirt. She shrieked under her breath and pressed the cloth against the wound, while she leant against the car.

She tried to get herself together as she turned around again, to search for the pills under her seat.

The hand on her shoulder startled her. "Listen, girl—"

She turned around and found the source of the familiar southern voice.


	14. Chapter 14

His heart was pounding so loudly, he even heard his heartbeat in thought while being unconscious. But hearing his own heartbeat wasn't the problem. Neither was the heat that seemed to burn everything on the inside.

The_ thirst._

He was always thirsty. His tongue was dry like sandpaper, even though he often felt the coolness in his mouth. If he would feel the coolness, he swallowed it willingly, letting the cold liquid refresh his gullet.

While he was unconscious, he always saw his little brother. Merle would try to reach out to him, to ask him where he was or whether he was alive or not, but he was always left alone in the darkness. Sometimes he thought he was seeing the familiar shape of Daryl's face _again_, but before he could talk to him, he always disappeared.

Merle was afraid, because he was alone. Hell, he didn't even know what was happening. Most of the time he only saw darkness, but every now and then, he heard _her_. The familiar voice soothed him; knowing there was _someone_ on the other side.

Or was his mind playing tricks with him?

He felt the coolness touching his lips again and he gulped it eagerly while his left hand touched the plastic bottle. Soon, his eyes were slightly opened.

The bright daylight hurted his eyes as_ fuck_, but he refused to close them, because he was afraid to fall into the darkness again. He let his body relax and he realised how tensed he had been all the time. The soft thing that he was leaning against caught his attention, and with all the power he had he turned around and saw the blue pair of eyes staring at him.

The food gave him strength, though his body still felt wearily because of the infection. He knew he should have told her right away, but he didn't want to swallow his pride; it would have made him look weak.

And that's exactly how he felt; when he got to know that Emmaly had taken care of him the last three days. This woman had seen him_ vulnerable,_ and Merle Dixon would never allow a woman to see him like that, except for his own ma. But she died a long time ago. Besides, he only had been a_ toddler_ back then.

When Emmaly had told him about how she had nearly died, he had grinded his teeth with frustration. _Sure_, he was grateful somewhere in the back of his mind, but he never _asked_ her to help him. Though maybe he would have done the same if the places had been reversed.

She had left the car after him being an ass,_ like usual_. The door was slammed shut after he had called her a stupid bitch, and something inside him said that had been a dumb thing to do. "Women 'r fuckin' complicated aliens," he muttered to himself. But he knew he had been wrong; Emmaly seemed to be perfectly normal compared to _other_ women.

He thought about that time, when the herd was passing through and she had that specific look in her eyes, but he forced himself not to think about that.

Merle got out the car after about twenty minutes to get some fresh air. He walked off the opposite direction of where Emmaly had disappeared, since he figured they both needed to cool down. While chewing on a granola bar, he looked at the sky and realised how much he had missed being outside. Sure, he was still feeling like shit, but the fact that he had eaten enough food made him feel slightly better.

After a while, he decided to go back to the car. When he didn't see the familiar chocolate brown hair, he frowned. He stepped closer and walked over to the other side of the car. Was she_ packing_?

_Stubborn bitch._

His hand grasped her shoulder. Even though they had argued not so long ago, leaving was probably the most _stupid_ decision to make right now. Even_ Merle_ wouldn't leave her now.

_But maybe later,_ he thought frustrated. Merle thought she deserved a little piece of his mind, but this time, in a more_ acceptable_ manner.

"Listen, _girl_—"

He turned her around and saw the blue watery eyes staring at him. Confused, he returned his stare at her. Was she crying because of _him_?

_Tough bitch ain' so tough anymore._

"What the fuck 's ya probl—"

The blood on her shirt said enough. He followed the blood stain with his eyes. The cloth that she pressed on her bare shoulder, was as well soaked with blood.

_No._

Hesitating and afraid, he gently took her hand. The knuckles were white from clenching the textile. He lifted her hand up and saw the deep scratches. The flesh was literally torn apart like a piece of paper. Though the bleeding seemed to have stopped, Merle was still unsure about what to do next. He knew scratches could be just as deadly as a bite. _Hell,_ he had seen it happen with Daryl and him, when the two of them were on the highway before meeting that damned group of people. The guy came to the highway with a large scratch on his ankle. A random ol' fella had bandaged and cleaned it, but a few hours later the guy turned anyway.

Merle tried to swallow the everlasting lump in his throat and looked back her. His blue eyes met hers, and he wished he wouldn't have let her go. _Goddamnit, ya sumbitch._

"Aam gonnae die, arenae I?"

Her voice sounded tired and not a trace of sadness could be found. She said it so determined that it sent a shiver down Merle's spine. "Shut up, don' talk_ bullshit_. Ya ain' gon' die." he growled, before lifting her up and setting her in the front seat with her body turned towards him. He grabbed the aid kit out of her hands. "Ya got meds or anythin'?" he asked while his mind seemed to react quickly. The fact that he could keep his head cool in situations like these, was a good thing. They wouldn't have enough time, he realised. _Would she even make it in the first place?_

Emmaly handed him the med box and Merle opened it immediately. He read the stickers on the containers and threw all the unnecessary ones over his shoulder. When he found the right ones, he opened it and gave her 4. She took the water bottle from behind her and swallowed the pills. Merle gave her another couple of different pills and she took them as well. Merle started to clean the wound with alcohol. She hissed in response and cringed under his touch. Merle grasped her arm tightly. "Toughen up, sugar." he grumbled while he continued to clean the wound.

"Dorn't let me turn," she suddenly said. Merle met her eyes while bandaging the wound. "Don' worry darlin', I won't."

"I mean, if I dae, ya need tae kill me. Dorn't let me become one of those things."

Merle met her eyes firmly and shook his head.

"Ya ain' gon' turn. Stop talkin' shit. Ya goin' ta be jus' _fine_."


	15. Chapter 15

_"Look, Ems! I foun' chocolate."_

_Her 30 year old brother grinned at her with the box in his hands. His 28-year old sister rolled her eyes at him. "Dae ye e'en know if it's still edible?" she chuckled while she raised her eyebrows at him. Nathan rolled his eyes. "It's tha apocalypse, ya think people 'r really still mindin' tha damn expiration date?" he replied, before sticking out his tongue. Emmaly smiled; Nathan looked like 20 again, with the smile on his face. They were happy, even though they shouldn't be._

_As soon as the outburst had started, Nathan and Emmaly had stayed in their own apartment in the suburb. Nathan had called his uncle, who had insisted they should come to him. Emmaly had protested, since she hated their uncle. Her uncle had always blamed Emmaly for turning his brother into an alcoholic. But her brother knew better than that, though he kept ofcourse his mouth shut about what happened between the walls of their home. After Nathan had hung up, he walked over to the window and whispered 'oh god', in which Emmaly had asked him what was wrong. When she had followed his gaze, she understood what caused his reaction. Their two old neighbours were being eaten by a random bunch of people. They immediately had packed their stuff and left their home._

_Emmaly shrugged. "I guess I'd raither die coz of food that's over date, instead of dyin' as one of those ugly ass things." she said to her brother while shrugging. Nathan grabbed a few boxes of chocolate and they continued to collect canned food and water._

_They walked back towards the house that they were staying at. However, Nathan stopped and grabbed his sisters hand. He pointed at something next to them, and Emmaly followed his gaze._

_Flowers were covering the green grass; a few wild roses and daisies that had different colors gleamed in the bright sunshine. Nathan let go of her hand and smiled._

_"Happy easter, sis."_

* * *

Her eyes shot open and she sat up straight. A strong hand pushed her gently back into the matress. The blue eyes were looking at her with a quite worrisome expression. "Sorry ta wake ya up," he mumbled awkwardly. "But ya need ta eat somethin'."

Emmaly nodded and smiled slightly. "It's okay, I slept lang enough anyway." she replied softly. Merle nodded and gestured at the table in the living room. "Can ya walk?" he asked. Emmaly shrugged and tried to stand up, while Merle was standing close to her in case she would fall because of her weakened muscles.

And she did.

Merle caught her in his arms, their face only a few inches away from each other. "So yeah, case ye hadnae noticed, I cannae walk." she chuckled wearily. Merle laughed quietly and placed one of his arm under her bare legs and one behind her back. He lifted her up and Emmaly shrieked while she grabbed a handful of his shirt. "_Damn girl,_—easy on tha ears now, would ya?" he said, trying to make his voice sound threatening while he was actually amused by her reaction. She had been sleeping for one and a half day, but Merle woke her up sometimes to make sure she got plenty enough food, water, and her medication. It had been 5 days since she got scratched and she was doing better every time. He was relieved, that she had passed the transformation phase, but they still had to be careful.

She first had gotten a fever. One that had been even worse than Merle's. Merle had driven to a suburb in the same town where Emmaly had found the medical supplies, and he had found a stable place. It had 2 bedrooms, 1 bathroom, and a small kitchen and living room. It was better to stay here until Emmaly would feel better, he figured, since the drug store was nearby the house.

When he wasn't busy taking care of her, he would read a book (even though that bored him to death) or watch her sleep. Emmaly looked younger when being asleep, though he knew she had nightmares; she always whispered the name 'Nathan' in her sleep. Merle always wondered who it was; her boyfriend? Her dad? Her brother?

Sometimes he felt like asking her about it, but at the same time he didn't want to pressure the topic, knowing it could be sensitive. Hell, Emmaly didn't even know about _Daryl's_ existance.

Merle put her in the chair and walked off to the kitchen. He scooped some rice in the bowl and half a can of veggies. After he handed over the bowl, he got one for himself along with 2 bottles of water, and sat down opposite of her.

They ate their meal in silence. Merle was still thinking about the guy named Nathan while chewing on some rice. Emmaly peeped up at him and Merle met her glance. She smiled at him and looked down again. "How ya feelin'?" he asked quietly. Emmaly looked up again and grabbed the water bottle. "Better." she replied, while she twisted the cap off the bottle. Merle nodded.

Once they had finished their meal, Merle grabbed the bowls and put them down in the sink. He walked to Emmaly and shoved her chair backwards. He lifted the woman up in his arms again and walked towards the bedroom. "No," she breathed in his ear. "Can ye put me oan th' couch over there? I'm tired of layin' down all th' fuckin' time."

Merle looked at her in surprise and grinned. "Sure thang, sugar."

After he had placed her onto the couch, he took a seat opposite of her. He shoved the chair closer towards her and gently grabbed her bare shoulder. He forced her to sit up straight so he could check the wound. "Told ya ya wouldn' die," he smirked. Emmaly scowled, but didn't protest. He let go of her and leant back, though he didn't shove back the seat. "Ya should get som' sleep." He said, causing Emmaly to roll her eyes. "All I did was sleep th' lest coople 'o days." she replied while glancing at him. Merle sighed. "Alrigh' then, 'ave it yer way."

He wanted to stand up, but the touch of her warm hand stopped her. "Dorn't," she said softly. Merle flinched under her touch, but she let go of him right away. "Alrigh'," he said while he sat down again. "What d'ya wan' do then, sugar?" he wondered while eyeing her. Emmaly shrugged. "Tell me a story," she said with a smile, causing Merle to shake his head. "Ain' got many happy story's ta tell ya, sweethear'."

Emmaly grinned. "That's okay."

"No."

"_But_—"

"I said no."

"A question fur a question 'en?"

Merle was taken aback by the offer. He immediately thought about Nathan, _whoever the hell that may be._ Though he was never very interested in people, he had to admit that he actually _was_ interested in Emmaly. For some reason, he wanted get to know more about her; who she actually was and who she had been before all of this happened. "_Fine_," he grumbled, "ya can go first."

Emmaly clapped in her hands like a little child and Merle was amused by her reaction, though he didn't let it show. "Dae ye 'ave any siblings?"

"Pick anotha question." he growled. Emmaly rolled her eyes. "_Partypooper_," she said while sticking her tongue out at him, "ye agreed: a question fur a question. R'member, after this one ye can ask me anythin'."

Merle reconsidered._ Nathan_. Why the hell did he want to know so badly?

Probably because he saw how much pain it caused her.

"I might considar cuttin' that tongue out if ya ain' stop stickin' it out 't me." he mumbled. Emmaly chuckled. "Yeah, I 'ave a younger brotha." he finally admitted. "What's his name?" she asked curiously. Merle held his stump up. "Ya said only _one_ question. Nice try, Ems." he said in protest with a smirk on his face. Emmaly leant back into the couch again. "Alrigh', my turn." he rasped.

He hesitated at first.

"Who's Nathan?"

The amused look in her eyes disappeared, and soon they looked hollow and cold.

"How dae ye know 'bout him?" she whispered with her voice breaking. Merle inhaled deeply. "Ya talk 'bout 'im in ya sleep." he replied, causing Emmaly to look away in shame. ""S alrigh', ya don' have ta tell me if ya don' want to—" "—No, a _deal's a deal_. It's just, I haven't talked 'bout 'im fur such a lang time." she breathed while trying to look at Merle. She blinked a few times and cleared her throat.

"He was my older brother." she finally managed to say. Merle nodded. "What 'appened to him?" he wondered. Emmaly gazed at her hands and she ignored the deal they had made. "Dead."

There was a long silence; Merle was only looking at her as he tried to read her face, while she was plucking at her nails. For a long time the only sound was coming from the breeze outside.

"M' father did things," she suddenly said, "—_bad_ things."

Merle furrowed his eyebrows.

"Nathan found out one day an' beat mah father. We left an' got oorselves a job an' apartment. We lived together fur a long time, before th' apocalypse happened. After th' dead started tae kill th' livin', we left an' tried tae survive. We were a perfect team, but one time, it_ all_ went wrong. There was a herd, an' he told me tae hide in th' bathroom of a gym. He told me that he wood come _back_ fur me. If he wooldnae be back within one week, I wood hae tae go back tae our old house. Th' house where mah dad lived." she paused to clear her throat. "When he didne come back after one week, I went tae our old house. An' he was there, alive an' well. He had waited fur me. We went inside, expectin' tae fin' our faither. An' we _did_ fin' him. But he had already turned intae one of those things. An' he took Nathan..—"

Merle had listened to her story, paying his full attention to the words that were coming out of her mouth. The story was captured in his mind; he tried to picture her brother and father, the house that she had lived in, but when the girl stopped he looked up. Merle expected her to burst out in tears, but she didn't. She only heaved a sigh and continued to stare at her hands. _The fuck was he supposed to do next?_ Give her a hug? Tell her it was going to be alright?_ Hell_, that would be the last thing she needed right now. They were dead, and they wouldn't come back.

"Sorry." he forced himself to say.

Emmaly glanced at him and nodded. "Yeah, me too."


	16. Chapter 16

"Ye know, ye never really told me how ye ended up wi' only one 'and."

Merle looked at the woman who had made herself comfortable on the couch. Her legs were crossed and her left hand was resting on her bare knee. He ignored the feeling that stirred up inside of him by the sight of her bare legs and curves that were clearly visible through the white shirt she was wearing.

"Yeah? Well sweethear', it ain' a pretty story. Might s'well spare ya tha details." he shrugged while he stood up to grab a bottle of water. He heard Emmaly chuckle behind him. "Well, we ainae got much 'f a choice t' entertain oorselves wi'. So, unless ye hae a brilliant idea on how tae kill th' time.."

Merle sighed when he realised he wouldn't win this one from her. Hell, she was way too headstrong for that, just like him. They would probably end up fighting just like the first time they met.

"Well, alrigh'. Don' tell me I didn' warn ya." Merle said with a cautioning look on his face. Emmaly giggled and changed position. Merle swallowed the everlasting lump in his throat and looked down to get rid of the sensational feeling that was rising up in his chest because of her movements. "Well, day before ya foun' me, I was handcuffed t' a fuckin' pipe on a roof. 'Ad me som' powder 'n misbehaved a lil'. Stupid _nigga_ be thinkin' he can command me shit. People bein' _pussies_ 'n decidin' ta git involved. Suddenly, this lil' piece 'o crap, _a police officer_, comes hollin' at me, tellin' me ta behave 'cuz we in a apocalypse 'n all that sentimental _bullcrap_. Officer friendly pinnin' me 'gainst tha ground 'n he the one ta cuff me to a fuckin' pipe. Got left, while walkers were tryin' ta get a bite 'o me. Forced ta cut off m' own hand."

Merle hadn't expected that all the anger would suddenly come out. He realised he hadn't given himself much thought about what happened that day back in Atlanta. No, he basically pushed himself everyday, to find his little brother. He never allowed himself to think about officer friendly and his group of _puppets_. _Jack ass_, he growled in thought.

Emmaly looked shocked.

He realised he had managed to tone the agressive side of him down for the last few weeks. The girl had probably never seen the racist and violent side of him before, except for that night when he hit her._ Fuck._

"Told ya it wouldn' be a pretty story, sugar." he grumbled while he felt frustrated by the fact that she hadn't listened to him in the first place. Emmaly shook her head. "No, its alrigh'. Just.. _Why_ are ye sae full of hate an' anger, Merle?" she asked calmly. Merle's blood started to boil because of her question, and he tried to prevent himself from screaming at her for having the balls to ask such a idiotic question.

He was doing it _again_. Why the fuck did he let Emmaly get so close to him in the first place? It's not like he would pay her any attention if they hadn't been in an apocalypse.

That was obviously just an excuse, because he would.

There was something about her that Merle couldn't explain. Something about her appearance and personality, that could calm him down, make him forget all the bullshit of the ugly ass faces that were walking on the streets. Emmaly always managed to stay hopeful, even with the world gone to shit.

They had developed a friendship over the last few weeks. Merle wouldn't forgive himself for hitting her, regardless of the empty promise he made years ago. It was the frustration that took hold of him that night, plus the fact that he hadn't gotten high since one week; he was feeling like _shit_, both physically and mentally. The pressure had become too much and he just impulsively took it out on the person that was there at the moment.

Maybe they could relate to one another; they both had a _huge_ ego and even _more_ matching characteristics, so when they had to work together, they both had to swallow their pride and deal with the situation as is was. It was a learning process for both of them.

"I don't fuckin' know." he snapped while he tried to ignore her glance. He failed miserably and saw the blue pair of eyes looking at them with a blank expression. "Ask my ol' man, if ya wann' know so badly." he added, hesitating. Emmaly snorted. "Yoo're nae th' only one wi' a shit childhood. 'At ainae a reason tae be sae cruel." she said, while she folded her hands in her lap. Merle shook his head. "I didn' ask fo' a _therapy_ session now, did I? Wake tha fuck up, _girl,_ look around ya. Not everyone can be perfect 'n kind 's you. Open ya eyes, fo' fucks sake." Merle growled while he jumped up as he let his anger take over his mind and body. "How can ya be so stupid 'n naive, _huh?_! Ya be forgettin' that there are bad people on this planet! Tha fuck, girl, wha' woul' ya 'ave done if I was som' kin' of rapist 'n murderer, huh?! Ya should've jus' left me there, on tha fuckin' roof!"

Emmaly bit her lower lip and stood up, even though she was too weak to do so. She moved forward, while Merle looked at her with complete anger. His heart was pounding in his chest and he let all his anger flow through his body.

"—but yer so fuckin' perfect, am I rite?!_ Lil' _miss_ perfect,_ who got 'er 'ands clean on all 'o this." he continued to yell at her, while Emmaly was still gazing at him without emotion.

"I'm nae perfect." she said quietly. Merle scowled as he didn't understand what she was trying to tell him. "Wha' th' fuck 's tha' now, girl?" he exclaimed.

"I said, I'm nae perfect." she repeated. After that, she pressed her lips together and moved forward. The girl didn't hesitate and wrapped her arms firmly around his broad upperbody. Merle flinched in utter surprise when he felt the warm touch of her soft hands on his back, and her cheek pressed against his chest. The two of them kept their mouths shut, while she stayed there, holding him—while he stood there, not knowing what to do. He never let people hug him in the first place, and the ones that had hugged him were either young Daryl _or_ his drunk friends.

"Yoo're nae a bad person, Merle." her hushed voice spoke, with its heavy Scottish accent. Merle sighed. "Ain' so sure 'bout that, sweethear'. Did som' things I ain' proud of." he murmered in reply. Emmaly let go of him and distanced herself a little so she could look at him. Merle caught himself longing to the warm comforting touch right away, and the only think he could think of is about how his ol' man would _laugh_ at him if he could see him now. "Ye still thinkin' yoo're th' only one who made mistakes? Sorry tae brin' it tae ye, princess, but life ainae about bein' perfect." she said while she furrowed her eyebrows. Merle shook his head and ignored the name.

A long silence followed. Emmaly suddenly wavered on her legs. "_Fuck_." she mumbled, while leaning on the couch for support. "Alrigh' sugar, I think ya need ta lay down on tha pea." Merle chuckled as he moved forward and catched her before she could fall down. He gently lifted her up in his arms, and moved her to the bedroom.


	17. Chapter 17

The cool breeze caused her hair to stick to her face. She chuckled, enjoying this ride at such a beautiful day. It almost seemed like a normal summer's day, she thought, while closing her eyes and leaning on her arms.

"Ya jus' got better. Ya really think 's a good idea ta be hangin' outta tha window like tha'?"

Emmaly grumbled when the raspy yet familiar voice made her startle. He chuckled slightly because of her reaction.

They had left the house this morning and decided to go for the nearest gas station, since they were running low on gas. If they would find enough gas somehow, they would try to go to the CDC, though Merle didn't think it was still running. When Emmaly had looked at him with pleading eyes however, he had sighed and agreed to the plan.

"Do me a favor Scotty, check tha map now would ya? Fuck if I know 'f we goin' tha right way."

Emmaly glanced at him and turned around. Her tangled hair fell down and she closed the window. She focused her attention to the map in her lap and ran a finger on the highway they were currently driving on. Emmaly gazed outside for a brief moment before returning her attention back to the route again. "Yeah, we good." she mumbled. They probably had to drive for another 20 minutes or so, and Emmaly noticed that Merle was occasionally looking at her.

"Merle, 'M fine." she grumbled when she felt his gaze linger on her. "I'm not gonnae die, dorn't worry." she assured him with a more gentle tone this time. Merle mumbled something under his breath, and he continued to drive in silence.

After 17 minutes, they neared the gas station. The small building popped up in the distance and Merle turned around to look at Emmaly for a brief moment. "Can ya grab tha weapons?" he asked. Emmaly let the map fall on the ground and turned around. She got on her knees to grab the backpack and their weapons. A sigh escaped her lips when she felt something behind her. "That better nae be yer hand, Dixon." she said blankly while she grabbed Merle's prosthetic knife and her own dagger. The reply she got from him was a chuckle. _Just frustrated_, she reminded himself. _Just sexually frustrated._ Which wasn't exactly a weird thing, considering this man probably hadn't gotten laid since..

"When was th' lest time ye bucked?"

The question had left her mouth before realizing. Emmaly turned around and sat down again, while cursing herself in thought. "Wha's tha', darlin'?" Merle replied in confusion. Emmaly avoided his glimpse and looked outside. Merle shrugged and pulled over. It was a short walk to the gas station from here, so they both got out of the car and continued to go by foot, since they didn't know if someone was in there.

"So, when 'r ya goin' ta teach me all dem Scottish words, if ya goin' ta continue ta make fun of ol' Merle?"

They walked next to eachother, while gazing at the ground. Emmaly snorted. "Never." she smirked, causing Merle to shake his head. The place looked pretty abandoned, and so far they hadn't heard nor seen anything. When they reached the backdoor, they locked eyes. "Ready?" he whispered. Emmaly nodded and he opened the door. Trying to be as silent as possible, they crept into the small building and looked around. Merle let out a satisfied sigh when he realized they were alone. "Look, why dont'cha go look for som' supplies. I'll try ta get som' gas in tha meantime." he proposed while he looked into the shop. Some candybars caught his sight and he smirked. Emmaly nodded. "Sure. Go a'ead." she said while tapping his shoulder. Merle turned around. "Holler if ya need anythin'."

A small garage was visible behind some trees, about 35 meters away from the garage. Merle thought there could be gas in there somewhere, so he ran towards it.

Meanwhile, Emmaly was in the shop. The place had already been looted, but the people who had been here hadn't even tried to take supplies with them; the shelves were still half filled with food and other useful living goods. Emmaly grinned and took her backpack so she could fill it with food. While she let out a satisfied chuckle, she grabbed a candybar, realizing it was still edible, and ate it while gathering the supplies they needed.

A good 30 minutes later, her backpack was full. Emmaly had found a few plastic bags and had filled them aswell.

The sound of a door opening behind her confirmed that Merle was back. She didn't turn around and continued to put plastic bags over the filled ones, to prevent them from ripping. "An'? Any luck? Foond any gas?" she asked while she knotted the bags together.

Her mouth was brutally covered, while another hand grabbed her waist. Emmaly couldn't breathe at first, until she realised something was covering her mouth. She looked down, noticing the hands while the panic kicked in. She wanted to grab her knife, though another hand grasped her wrists. An unknown man came into her view and opened her belt. Trying to fight back as hard as she could, she kicked the man in the stomach, and he fell on his back while wailing muffled curses.

"Easy there, girl. We are not going to hurt you. We just need to remove your weapons, to make sure you won't hurt anyone here."

The guy sounded calm, but Emmaly knew better than that;_ everyone_ could fake a friendly personality these days.

Nevertheless, she nodded and allowed the strange man standing in front of her to take her belt. Just like the voice had said, the man only took her belt, and she was surprised when he didn't try to do anything else. Emmaly snorted from relieve, though her heart was still pounding wildly at the thought that she was alone in here; Merle wouldn't hear her.

"I'm going to let go of you now. Do us both a favor, and keep quiet, so you won't attract any geeks. Got it?"

Emmaly nodded. The man slowly let go of her and she turned around immediately.

4 men were standing before her. Two of them seemed to be Mexican. The other two had their guns aimed at her forehead. Her eyes grew wide. One of the Mexicans noticed her tensed expression. He slowly raised his hands. "He won't do anything, unless you decide to start screaming. Just like I said, precautionary measures." he said with a hushed voice. "Now, are you alone?"

Emmaly was unable to swallow, since her throat felt dried out. She shook her head, but she knew she was the worst actress in history. The man rolled his eyes. "Quit playing games. We're not stupid, lady. We all heard how you welcomed us. Like I said, _no killing_." he said firmly. Emmaly scowled. "Yeah? Anyain can say 'at. How can I trust ye?" she fired back. The man in front of her put his hands on his hips. He turned around to look at the other man and nodded once. They lowered their weapons. "See? No big deal. Now tell me."

She knew she could do 2 things; she could either scream for help, but she knew they would kill her right away, or she could tell them the truth. _But what if they would find and kill Merle?_

_They can't kill him_, a voice in the back of her mind said. Emmaly pushed the thoughts away.

"One," she admitted, "Jist one I'm travellin' wi'."

Some of the guys started to whisper at eachother, while the man, who seemed to be their leader nodded. "Alright, miss. My name is Martinez. And how do I call you—?"

Emmaly snorted. "Emmaly." she said dryly. Martinez smiled slightly. "Alright, miss Emmaly. We have a town not far from here with about 50 people. We would like to invite you and your friend to come. Got everything we need: doctor and medical supplies, food, shelter, water. Basically everything. Why don't you come with us and get some decent rest. Looks like you could use a meal, miss."

Her eyes closed for a minute and she opened her mouth to say something. A town? _Supplies?_ _Shelter? Water?_ It almost seemed _too_ good to be true. What would Merle say?

_Get tha fuck outta there, Scotty._

But he wasn't here right now. And the guy didn't seemed to be a liar.

She looked at him. "Let's say, if I werenae not mentally insane an' there would be such a thing.. Why would ye.. help _us_?"

It was a fair question, really. They had only just met. And even though it sounded tempting, she had to stay realistic. Could be murderers. _Or even worse_.

The guy smiled slightly, though one of the other guys spoke. "Well, you throw knives—" "How the _fuck_ do you know?"

Martinez chuckled and turned around to look at the guy while waiting for his explanation. "The badge on the sheath."

_Fuck._

A few weeks ago, before the outburst had started, Emmaly had already bought a set of throwing knives. The man from the shop had given her the badges so she could tell the specific types apart.

'They're not mine." she lied, in which the guys laughed. "You don't have to be afraid, miss. We won't do you any harm. This guy right behind me—" Martinez gestured at the man who just talked about the knives, "he has a wife and a daughter back in Woodbury."

"Woodbury?" she repeated sheepish. "The name of the town." he explained, while nodding at the guy. The guy walked forward and grabbed a wallet out of his jacket. Emmaly jumped back at first, but the guy raised his hands. She looked at him with suspicion before he showed her the photo. A beautiful woman was smiling at her, while a small boy was was tugging her sleeve and looking at her. The man next to the woman was looking back at the boy with a childish grin. Emmaly felt a lump in her throat and looked at the man, who smiled slightly.

"We have other kids. And even Feline, who is 9 months pregnant." Martinez continued, while the man stepped back again. Emmaly nodded. "Alright.. If we dorn't like it, we can leave?" she wondered, while she thought about what could happen if the group was some sort of mental sect. But to her surprise, Martinez nodded.

The door was swung open. "Get on tha drown, ya_ cuntsuckin'_ bastards!"

Emmaly ran towards Merle and raised her hands. "Dorn't! They arenae gonnae hurt us!" she exclaimed. Merle raised his eyebrows. "Tha fuck, _Scotty?_ Ya dumb 'r wha'?!" Merle roared back at her with an angry expression on his face. Emmaly moved forward, until she was standing right in front of him. She gently put the safety off and grabbed the gun out of his hands. Merle was still looking angry, nevertheless he allowed her to take the gun from him. "They hae a town." she whispered. This caught his attention. "Town? What, ya high on meds 'r somethin'?" he growled back to her. Emmaly rolled her eyes. "If ye would just listen tae me for one minute. They hae 50 people an' they got everythin' we need. Shelter, food, water, protection. _Everythin_'."

Merle shook his head and sighed. "Ya really ain't sayin' this, are ya? Ya really wann' risk ya life like this?" he said in a hushed tone. Emmaly looked away. "I'm tired of runnin', Merle. We both almost died out there." she whispered defeated. Merle grumbled. "I ain't comin' wi' ya. I need ta fin' mah lil' brotha." he said harshly. When Emmaly looked up to him, Merle pretended to not care about the fact that her eyes were welling up. She blinked a few times and bit her lower lip. "Please, dorn't. Dorn't leave. Not now. Lets— " she paused, trying to find the right words. "Let's just stay there for a little while, alright? Get some food an' some rest. We can leave anytime we want. I'll come wi' ye."

He opened his mouth, though nothing came out. The men behind them were leaning against the counter and walls as they eyed the two of them in silence.

"Ya wann' come wi' me? Ya sure 'bout tha'? Can be a real pain in tha ass." he stated while looking deep into her blue eyes. Emmaly chuckled. "I dorn't hae anythin' left ta live for," she said sadly, while listening to his heavy breathing. She let out a chuckle when Merle openly admitted to be a pain in the ass. "Naethin' I cooldnae handle. I think we already had our moments, ye know. Besides, ye wooldnae survive without me."she snickered in amusement. Merle rolled his eyes. They both turned around to face the men behind them. Martinez stepped forward, clearly feeling uneasy at the sudden intimidating appearence from Merle. "And who is this?" he asked uncomfortably. "Merle." Merle rasped. The men behind them stood up aswell to look at him. When they saw the metal that replaced his hand, they all looked shocked. Merle grumbled something under his breath while Emmaly bit her lips to prevent herself from laughing. Merle broke the silence. "Well, we headin' fo' yer damn _disneyland_ 'r wha'?"


	18. Chapter 18

During the ride to Woodbury, Merle and Emmaly hadn't spoken to eachother, since they both were lost in thought. It was a lot to process and it almost seemed unrealistic as they imagined what Woodbury would be like. But when they had arrived, Martinez hadn't exaggerated at all; it was huge. Well, _apocalypse_ huge. The gates in front of the small town were heavy guarded, and when they opened to let the vehicles pass through, Emmaly pressed her nose against the window and gasped.

People were walking on the streets, as if the outburst had never happened. A little girl, that she recognized from the picture they had shown to her at the gas station, was playing along with another boy of her age. "Well be damned." Merle muttered while he looked around. Emmaly shook her head in disbelief. "This.. This 's just." she stopped; never in all those months she had expected to find something like this. "Breathe, Scotty. Or do I need ta give ya mouth ta mouth?" Merle mumbled, half annoyed and half amused because of this place and her reaction. Emmaly ignored his comment and got out of the car. Merle followed her, and they waited for Martinez and his men, who had already gotten out of the car a few moments ago.

They waited for 5 minutes, until Martinez came back. "Governor is busy, but we'll take you to your room." Martinez said quickly with a nod. Suddenly, a small man left one of the houses and ran towards them. He seemed nervous and anxious, as he shove his small glasses up his nose. "This man will take you to your house. I need to go now, I have watch duty. Catch you guys later." Martinez smiled and for the first time Emmaly smiled back at him. Martinez stopped in his tracks. "Oh," he said with a grin, "welcome to Woodbury."

Martinez left them and Merle raised his eyebrows at the stranger that stood before them. "Oh, hello, you must be Emmaly and Merle. I-I'm Milton." he rambled. Milton offered Emmaly his hand and she shook it with a smile. When he offered Merle his hand, Merle didn't accept the friendly gesture at first. However, after Emmaly shoved her elbow to his shoulder, he did it anyway, with his good hand. Milton looked embarrassed when he realized Merle's metal hand replacement.

"Let me take you to your rooms, then." he said nervously while he waved at one of the buildings on the left. Emmaly and Merle exchanged a look as they followed Milton into the house.

They walked up the staircase towards the 3rd floor. Milton gestured at the door in front of them. "H-here's your room. There food a-and water in the fridge. Go easy on the gas and hot water." "— _Hot water?_" Merle repeated in disbelief. Milton nodded with a smile. "Yes, and fresh clothes are in the dresser."

Merle and Emmaly looked at eachother and shook their heads as they tried to remain cool. "Wait— we share _rooms_?" Emmaly wondered when she had processed everything he had said. Milton nodded. "Two seperate bedrooms, since I-I, well, we didn't really know if y-you— " "It's_ fine_, dorn't worry. Thank you." Emmaly chuckled as she accepted the key that Milton gave her.

Milton nodded once more and left them alone. They waited until he had left the building, before Emmaly started to laugh from joy. Merle tried to grab the key out of her hands, but Emmaly had already unlocked the door. He pushed her inside and closed the door behind them.

It was small, but it was luxury at its best for the both of them; there was a kitchen, with an actual fridge, stove, sink, microwave and toaster. There was a small table with 3 chairs in the center of the room.

Emmaly opened one of the counters in the kitchen and shrieked when she saw it was filled with food "_Holy fuckin' shit."_ Merle whispered behind her. Emmaly shook her head and opened the fridge, that was filled with some food, water bottles and even a bottle with white liquor. Merle pushed her away and grabbed it to read the etiket. "Som' kin' of self brewed shit." he said, while he read the back. Emmaly frowned. "Well, if ye dorn't like it, might as well hand it over tae me, then." she said in all seriousness while she tried to grab the bottle away. "Ya fuckin' wi' me?! 'M gonn' git drunk 'till I'll be_ pukin'_ mah brains out."

Emmaly rolled her eyes and noticed two doors on the left and one on the right. Curious and excited, she opened the doors on the left. One was a bathroom; it had a toilet, sink and small shower in it. When she shoved the shower curtain away, she saw shampoo, conditioner and body wash. "_Pinch me_." she whispered to herself, though she jumped up when she felt a sharp nasty pain on her shoulder. Merle was laughing behind her and left her alone again.

The other room was one of the two bedrooms; it had a very small bed and there was a shelf with some books on it. Emmaly laughed of joy and Merle walked into to the room. "Why ya laughin', Scotty?" he rasped. Emmaly pointed at the books. "I'm takin' this one." she said announced firmly. Merle rolled his eyes and shrugged. "Fine wi' me." he murmered as he left to go to the other room. Emmaly sat down on the bed and closed her eyes. This was _unbelievable_. All the doubt from earlier vanished while she inhaled deeply to calm herself down.

10 minutes later, she got up and opened the counter; there were both women's and men's clothes. She grabbed a short and a simple white tanktop. There were even _panties_ there, and she grabbed one of her size.

Merle was sitting in one of the chairs at the table, cleaning his metal prosthetic. He looked up when he saw Emmaly. "This 's great, isnae it?" she chirped happily with a smile. Merle managed to return the smile and he nodded. Emmaly opened the door to the bathroom. "I'm gonnae t' take a shower." Emmaly said. Merle stood up. "Alrigh'. 'M goin' ta grab our bags out 'f tha car." he answered before opening the front door. When Emmaly heard the door shut, she turned the shower on and undressed. There was a basket in the corner of the room, and she threw all her dirty clothes in it.

The girl examined her body in the small mirror and she was shocked at the sight. The once so curvy body had lost a lot of weight and her ribs were slightly visible. She sighed and got into the shower.

_Warm water._

The first response she came up with was laughing. Simply _laughing,_ because she was so happy in this moment. Once she had washed her hair with both shampoo and conditioner, and her body with body wash, she turned the shower off to leave some hot water for Merle. She took one of the towels out of the cabinet in the corner.

The new clothes felt like a rebirth to her and she smiled when she saw herself in the mirror, thinking she looked a lot better already.

She laid down on her bed with the door of her room left open, and she drifted off to sleep, not worried for once.


	19. Chapter 19

The slamming door woke her up.

Emmaly opened her eyes slightly and stretched herself before turning around. Merle stood in the door opening and he suddenly had a shocked expression on his face. It took a moment for Emmaly to get up, since she actually didn't want to leave her warm bed. When she stood straight, she stretched again and walked towards Merle. She noticed his expression and she frowned. "What?"

Merle swallowed and shook his head. "Ya look differen'." he explained, while looking at her face. Emmaly grinned. "What's 'at supposed tae mean?" she wondered while pushing him out of the way. Merle turned around. "Ya jus' look differen'." he said sheepish. Emmaly chuckled and opened the fridge. "I'm makin' cheeseburgers for dinner." she announced. It was nearly 8 PM, but they hadn't eaten anything since this morning. Merle sighed from satisfaction. "A woman ta mah heart." he said as he patted her shoulder. He walked to his own bedroom and returned with some clothes in his arm. "Help me with tha doomed thing." Merle demanded while gesturing at the metal. Emmaly didn't turn around and grabbed the pork out of the fridge. "What's th' magic word?" she asked dryly. Merle frowned. "Fuck if I know. _Abracadabra?_"

Emmaly turned around and narrowed her eyes while smirking. "Nae, it's _please._ But I'll accept it, since ye look like yoo've been digging tae hell." she said while taking the metal prosthetic off. Merle grinned and went to the bathroom, while Emmaly finished to prepare their meal.

Once she heard the shower running, she allowed herself some time to think. She sat down next to the window and stared outside. What if this place _was_ too good to be true?

She shook her head, tired of her own anxiety. The memories from last month were flooding through her mind, while she continued to look outside. The sun was almost down and she hugged herself, realising it was getting colder.

Emmaly stayed there for a few minutes, watching the abandoned street while Merle was showering. She turned around, though she stopped when she saw movement on the street. While squeezing her eyes together, she could see Martinez, along with 3 men. It was the tall one that caught her attention.

After he had shaved himself and pulled his new clothes on, he threw his filthy clothing in the basket and left the bath room. The smell of meat and cheese welcomed him once he stepped into the other room. He smiled in satisfaction and saw two plates on the table with two cheeseburgers on each of them. Emmaly was waiting for him while holding a glass of the liquor and he frowned. "Now wha' Scotty, started tha party without Ol' Merle?" he teased as he sat down opposite of her. Emmaly didn't reply and continued to stare at her glass. Merle looked at her in confusion and he snapped his fingers to get her attention. Emmaly startled and looked up at him. "Sorry." she said, while blushing and sipping from her drink. "Ya alrigh'?" he asked, while he grabbed the bottle of the table and poured some of the alcohol into his empty glass. Emmaly nodded. "Yeah. Jus' tired. Today's been a weird day." she said as she put the glass down on the table. Merle nodded and gulped down the liquor, receiving a questioning glare from Emmaly. "Wha'? Hadn' 'at alcohol for 'bout 2 months now. Can' a man 'ave som' fun?" he said while he grabbed a cheeseburger from his plate. Emmaly shook her head and laughed quietly. "Be m' guest." she chirped while she took a cheeseburger aswell.

Merle couldn't help himself and looked at Emmaly while she basically ate her cheeseburger like a cavemen; the ketchup was all over her mouth, but she didn't seem to feel very bothered by this. For some reason, it turned him on; a woman who actually wouldn't care about others opinions while eating a _not-so-lady-like_ meal. He licked the fat off his fingers and laid down the cheeseburger to pour some more liquor in his glass. Merle's eyes never left her as he took the glass to take a sip.

When she had finished the first cheeseburger, she used her hands to clean her face. Ketchup was rubbed all over her lips, causing Merle to laugh out loud. Her eyes darted up to him. "What?" she asked. Merle shook his head. "Got somethin' over there." he said, while pointing at the corner of his mouth. Emmaly rolled her eyes when he continued to smirk at her. She rubbed her mouth again. "Gone?" she asked while playfully raising her eyebrows at him. Merle shook his head and leaned forward. He gently brushed the ketchup from her lips with his thumb. An amusing smile was lingering around his lips when he noticed how her cheeks fluttered red.

Their dinner continued in silence; something between them had changed after that moment.


End file.
